My Modern Vintage Wedding

One Year Anniversary

2010-06-04T06:57:00.000-07:00

Over Memorial Day weekend we celebrated our one year anniversary! My how time flies. We headed back down to the Homestead for the weekend, and it was a fantastic time full of great moments and nostalgia (is it nostalgia if it's memories of just a year ago?). We kept saying "A year ago at this moment we were..." and then would recount what we were doing at that time. It was fitting because some of our activities of this weekend paralleled those of our wedding weekend (unplanned and totally cheese, but sweet)!

Esme, our wedding coordinator, arranged to have us in an upgraded suite in the tower, the tallest part of the hotel with the best view, for our stay. And as I got ready for dinner, G called me out to the living room to look at something...

There were the unusual Amnesia roses that I carried as my bouquet on our wedding day. Mr. P had called the local florist (who did our wedding flowers) and asked for them. First, I was so incredibly touched by this!!! Second, I was in shock that he even knew the name of the flowers and third, since they are a bit rare and unusual, I really appreciated the effort it took to get them (they had to be special ordered from Guatemala).

So there we were on our first night on our anniversary weekend (we got married on the 30th, the next day, which would be the big dinner and anniversary night). But this night, we headed over to Garth Newel, the barn-turned-music center, to take in a dinner and a chamber music concert. It was hosted in the very barn that we had our rehearsal dinner exactly one year earlier. They introduced the new Steinway that the organization just acquired and we sat in the second row, where we enjoyed the big and resonant sounds of live chamber music. It was fantastic!

The chef, Randy Wyche, made a great dinner for the evening including an Indian-inspired tomato curry soup, shrimp in puff pastry, beef tenderloin with gratin potatoes, and a little capuccino cream dessert. He and some of the wait staff remembered us and told the director of the organization, who broke out the Champagne and dinner and made a toast to us in front of all the concert guests! It was SO touching and sweet!!! Mr. P even went around later with the rest of the bottle of Champagne and gave some to the 30-some concert-goers/dinner guests. Several of these kind strangers came up to us afterward and congratulated us on our one year anniversary. The food was yummy and the impromptu celebration was more than we could ever expect! They really made our night memorable!!!

Chef Randy raising the one year anniversary finger!

The next day, the day of our anniversary, we got up and had some coffee in our room then headed down to the pool...exactly what we did a year earlier. Again, not planned, but it's just the natural thing to do in a resort like this. There we lay, taking in the sun and reading our books and newspapers.

We had brought a bunch of stuff to take on a picnic, figuring that we'd decide on a location once we got to the resort. Mr. P had asked around, and decided to surprise me with a 'special' location for our picnic. We stopped by the local grocery store as well as the fancy new Old Dairy market and picked up some fun and traditional picnic goodies for our little adventure. Mr. P had packed a cooler full of beverages, including Champagne.

So we parked at an overlook spot and started to walk towards our destination. Again, I had no idea...and apparently G didn't either. It was about a mile hike up a steep mountain...on gravel...in my sandals and a dress, carrying a bag full of gear as Mr. P carried a very heavy cooler and picnic basket. I cut my toe on some rocks and was laughing at our by now hot and sweating state. Any notions of a romantic picnic photo session were out the door (I was carrying a heavy tripod, too!). It got so hot (the day was about 90 degrees as it was) that Mr. P had to take off his shirt (which he never does).

But finally, we got up to Flag Rock, a spot overlooking Warm Springs and much of Bath County. It is a gazebo built on top of a flat rock formation...and it is breath taking. Speaking of which, we finally got to catch our breaths and enjoyed our picnic of fried chicken (yes, chicken, we made the exception here), potato salad, orzo, cheese and crackers, and some water melon! I even brought a flower. Cheesy!

I also packed some year-old macarons! Mr. P's mom had saved some in the freezer! This time I used a salty caramel (that a friend gave me for my bridal shower) for the filling. They were good...but definitely stale!

Then we headed back down the mountain and drove to another little surprise, our friend Mary and Ryan's incredibly gorgeous farm right on the Jackson river. There we caught up with them and played with there new dogs and goats. They have such a magnificent property, where they have a guest cottage and a historic old main house (which they are redoing) and the river is just yards away, where they have placed Adirondack chairs for leisurely evening fishing and where they can view bald eagles and other wild life.

They also rescued some goats. Mary is a gourmand and was thinking that she'd raise them for milk and cheese, but alas found it to be too expensive and difficult. So now they're just the cutest pets. (Speaking of gourmand, she made a watercress pesto from what she found on the water's edge and some great smoked salmon noshes). Blue and Cotton, the rescued Great Pyrenees, the newest members of the family--and at over 100 and some pounds--are quite the handful! Blue really loves to be under foot and enjoys giving kisses. Lots O kisses! It was a lovely time. Oh yeah, one year later, me, in a white dress, having a great time (and being kissed by a handsome fella) in this beautiful valley!

We headed back to the hotel where we showered and got ready for dinner. Esme said she had an anniversary cake for us. Our wedding cake, as you may know, was a cakewreck, and the hotel actually lost the top tier. So our coordinator had another one made for us...and I was really anxious to see it.

For old time's sake, we walked around the property to snap some portraits...I've gained some weight! There was a Memorial Day barbecue on the lawn near where we had our cocktail hour. It looked so fun and festive, and Esme was, again, there to make sure things went on without a hitch.

We sat down for dinner, got complimentary Champers, we exchanged our modest little gifts...okay, mine was modest, Mr. P went all out.

We exchanged gifts for this 'paper' anniversary. I used our boxed invitation to hold the make-shift anniversary card (a one-year message written on our wedding invitation) and a framed picture of his bride (try not to gag). Mr. P gave me the most touching cards and a little book...as well as a piece of fine art photography (actually, I'm holding a little print out of the real thing, which is being framed). I also have something forthcoming for him! We both got a little misty...

Dinner was delicious and very old-school-traditional--such a throw-back. You know, lots of table side service, flames, etc. We had escargot, spinach salad, the ever-present-palate-cleansing-sorbet, and Chateaubriand for two. Our window seat afforded us a GREAT view of the Memorial Day fireworks on the lawn outside...And Esme (our wedding coordinator) stopped by to say hello!!! She's the best.

And for dessert, our cake!!! Our monogram! And... I guess Esme arranged with Mountain Laurel Creations, our florists, to have the various flowers and greenery in our wedding decor to be arranged as a cake topper. What a fabulous surprise!!!! The cake was actually DELICIOUS. We should have gone with this cake (long story, read about it here). Ten thin layers of lemon cake, separated by raspberry filling, surrounded by cream and then enveloped in fondant. It was lovely.

On our way home, we stopped by my mom's who hosted a Memorial Day dinner for me and Mr. P's parents (I could shoot myself for not getting pictures of actual PEOPLE rather than just food). Mr. P helped to grill the steaks and the food was delicious. We even shared our anniversary cake. We ALSO had a special announcement for everyone...

Macarons and Marie : Our BIG Day!! (a day to remember)

2010-05-28T20:39:00.000-07:00

**Warning: This is a VERY long post!** (Photos courtesy of Jackson Photography and friends)

One year ago this very weekend, we were married on a sunny and beautiful Spring day. I thought the most fitting way to end my recaps would be of that day. (Happy Anniversary, Mr. P!)

So here goes: Our day to remember!

I woke up very early, around 7 am. Despite staying up until 2 am the night before, I was too excited to sleep. Looking down from our suite, I could see our wedding venue, and it got me so excited. It was such a beautiful, serene sight to behold.

Throughout the day, I could see the progress of the set up for the wedding and cocktail hour. I was SO giddy!

I went to the gym as Mr. P met up with a buddy that had flown in late the night before. My mom had called to say that she was having breakfast at this funny little place in town called, Lindsay's Roost. Lindsay's is run by Robert Lindsay, and is a great little hole-in-the-wall diner. We have been going there for years and was our little secret breakfast place. There I find the room filled with people from our wedding. Guess it wasn't a big secret.

Mr. Lindsay congratulated me on our wedding and gave me a Lindsay's Roost t-shirt!

I had NO appetite and after visiting with my family, I went to my room to change to head out to the pool. It was late morning, and I had time before my 1pm hair appointment. I guess I should have been stressing out and checking on things, but I figured Esme, our coordinator, had it under control. (In retrospect, I should have taken a peek at the cakewreck, but that's probably just as well.)

Mr. P and I don't care much about superstition and tradition, so it was no big deal that we were hanging out at the pool together, along with a couple of friends there for the wedding. We saw several of our guests and it was fun to just relax before the big event. It was bright and sunny with clouds the passed over the sun, casting the occasional much needed shade. Some worried that it would rain, but the forecast called for sun and some overcast conditions later in the afternoon. That would eventually be PERFECT for our garden wedding.

TIP #1: Girls, try to RELAX a little before your event. If you heeded my tip from my rehearsal post and have a great coordinator, you can kick back!

I vividly recall laying there, the sun on my face and NOT wanting to get up...for my own wedding! It was so gorgeous and peaceful! But I remember thinking that I'd be late and mad at myself if I didn't. So I went to my room, put on a track suit and headed down to the salon for my hair appointment. I didn't do the getting ready together thing with my BMs. That required too much coordination. Instead, on their own, they had gone there ahead of me, gotten their hair done, and got themselves ready to meet me back at my room by 2:30.

Waiting there at the salon was BM, Abby. She showed me the petal cones that she and the other BMs made and left there for Esme to handle. She also ensured me that things would be fine and were taken care of. Meanwhile, the florists arrived in my room and left the flowers. Here's a shot of me getting my hair done. Sans makeup. Quick, look away!

I arrived in my room to find my three pretty bridesmaids all gussied up and ready to go. I still had to get dressed and put on my makeup (I did my own make-up). As I did, the girls arranged for a little snack of fruit, cheese, and Champagne. It was so nice!

Here are some getting ready and detail shots.

We were running late! As I was getting ready, one of the photogs was in Mr. P's room, getting pictures of him preparing. They even had time to get pictures of him and the groomsmen!!

After we got ready, we headed to the front of the resort for the first look. Mr. P was waiting there with his brother and the photographers. My BMs and I stumbled out of Abby's car (which we had to drive the short distance up the hill because there was no way we could walk with all our dresses, flowers, and gear)!

Mr. P waiting, and waiting.

The first look!

I distinctly remember Mr. P's speechlessness and...his comment of "You missed a spot" pointing to my left armpit where there was a little stubble. Gotta love that man!!! (My sister later brought down a razor for a quick tidy up.)

We went around the resort and took some portraits before the ceremony. We were running SOOOOO late, about 30 minutes late. And Father Jim was pissed. I had mentioned in my rehearsal post that Father Jim is a stickler for punctuality, and apparently he had complained that he was not happy that we kept our guests waiting. I mean, where did they have to go? It's a wedding, they can wait.

Anyway, Mr. P headed down to the garden first as my BMs and I got some portraits in. And then we headed down there ourselves after Esme found us in the garden gallery and yelled at us to hurry up!

And here are the moments right before the ceremony. I was getting a little nervous, taking lots of deep breaths. People were running around and getting into place.

Esme was conducting and orchestrating everything, making sure everyone had their cues. And the biggest cue of the start of the wedding was the seating of Mr. P's mom.

I waited in the wings as first the groomsmen walked out, then Mr. P...

The bridesmaids, the flower girl and ring bearer...

Then it was my turn. I peaked around the corner to see everyone turned around looking at me. It was SO exciting.

Then my mother and I started our walk down the aisle. I asked her if she was nervous. She said yes, I told her not to worry.

And we walked, slowly, I was smiling an uncontrollable smile...

Mr. P looked nervous and shy--he could barely look at me...

And there we were. Finally, at the altar...

And here's the good part! Father Jim, in all his frustration and flustered-ness, forgot the order of the program. He launched right into the middle of the program, flipping through his book, coughing loudly. It was a little awkward. What was worse was that he forgot the part of the hand-off of parent to husband. So my poor mom stood there for a good long while as Father Jim was reading the marriage portion of the ceremony! The part that was supposed to come later!

Mr. P discreetly got Father Jim's attention and reminded him of my mother standing there. He did a quick something or other and she finally got to sit down. OY! (No one noticed but the bridal party.)

So he continued with the marriage portion with our vows right away (I guess he was trying to get us back on track time wise?)....

Do you, Miss P, take Mr. P to be your lawfully wedded husband...?

We exchanged rings and vows. Then there was a somewhat clumsy bonding ritual.

And then we kissed!

...And then he had the nerve to say "You don't have to kiss her like you're in the back seat of a car!" Oooooh boyyyyyy. Good thing we both have a great sense of humor.

We turned to face our family and friends as he pronounced us man and wife. I had gotten a bit choked up when I was reciting my vows. You can tell in this picture!

Then he read the marriage portion AGAIN! And when he said, "You may kiss the bride", we replied in unison, "Again?" And again we kissed! This time people noticed that something was a bit awry! Look how hard my sister is laughing (we were also cracking up)! It was definitely memorable. We call it "So Nice, We're Married Twice!"

Then we received communion and then sat down for the remainder of the Eucharist. Giggling at what just went down, and also really relieved and happy, we enjoyed the moment, watching our friends and family take communion.

BUT in the distance, there was a slam of the spa building door and out come a mother and son couple, dressed in shorts with their Big Gulp and beach towels trapsing through our ceremony! HELLO? Where was Esme? Did they not see a WEDDING GOING ON? Now that, that I was pissed about. But it could not be planned for or controlled. So I was going to ponder it any further and let it ruin my wedding. It wasn't noticed by the guests in the front anyway. But, really?

"What the...."

There was a part in the ceremony where my friend Michelle was to read. Father Jim, of course, forgot, so we had to remind him. Michelle did a great job eventually!

Father Jim said a few words, and with that we were married and the ceremony was officially over! We walked back up the aisle, recessional music playing, and we were giggling, happy, smiling, and SO RELIEVED! It all went fine (despite the ridiculous glitches) we were thrilled!

Here we are moments afterwards. Hugging, just the two of us, in disbelief, taking it all in. Then our family and friends poured out of the garden. There were congratulations and hugs by close family members. These are my very favorite moments...

They were then ushered up the hill to the cocktail hour as we remained under the garden gallery to get some group portraits.

After we were finished, the BMs and groomsmen and our family joined the group as we lingered for a bit. Soaking it all in, looking down at our wedding site and then up at the wonderful group that had gathered to celebrate with us. Then we walked up the hill through a fabulous gauntlet of the petal toss!! That was so fun!

The cocktail hour was a great time to talk with friends and finally catch our breaths! The children played on the lawn in this valley, we were nestled between the grand old hotel and the majestic Allegheny mountains. It was like a dream. I felt like I was transported back in time to an old fashion lawn party. This is what I envisioned. We took a few more portraits and had fun with the photographers before we all went inside for dinner.

As guests went inside and took their seats in the ballroom...

...my mom pinned my bustle, I changed out of my veil and put on the hairflower I made. And we were all announced. Then....there was the first dance. We had practiced after our one session with the instructors, for several nights. Mr. P had studiously written down notes for himself. But we choked! Check it out! We looked so awkward that at one point, I decided we should dance separately and end it quickly!

Everyone clapped and hooted in good cheer and fun. And with that we all sat down, and we started our meals. We had a sweetheart table which helped make us accessible.

People came by and chatted. At one point as dinner was being served, a poor server dropped a large tray of food all over Michelle and broke Graham's camera! Yet another quirky moment! I started clapping as did everyone else. The hotel handled it quickly and professionally. They took Michelle to get a new dress from one of the shops and gave Graham a generous check for his camera. I barely blinked and it was taken care of! Again, I didn't let it ruin my wedding, just a sidenote on our wedding journey!

The calm before...

Oopsy!!

We had so much fun eating, drinking, and savoring the moment!

Throughout the night, friends took pictures of themselves at our "Faux-to-Booth"--a cheap and easy fix to our non-existant photobooth budget: Mac has a photobooth program! And so we just set up our computer and asked people to join in on the fun! At the faux-to-booth table, we left cards and encouraged people to upload their photos from the day.

We also asked everyone to sign our guest "book"--which was actually a photo matte for the large group photo that we took with everyone. It would eventually look something like this:

I finally got somewhat of an appetite and enjoyed a bit of my meal. After the fifth course, I went upstairs to change into my reception dress (which my mom made)!!! And we had the toast. Mr. P's brother was so nervous, my sister was magnanimous, groomsmen Augustin was suave, and groomsmen Berk was HIGHLARIOUS!

Then we cut our hideous cake! It even tasted bad! We laughed. My mom took that opportunity to do a random speech, which oddly made everyone tear up! Mr. P's dad, of course, got in on the action and made a speech, too.

Then there was dancing, dancing, dancing!!!! I danced with FIL as G danced with his mom. My mom is not a dancer and refused all invitations to do so. She had a great time watching us. I spent the entire night on the dance floor, forgetting to get pictures of me in the photobooth!! I had literally the time of my life. We were soooooo happy to be surrounded by our friends and family and it was so AMAZING and wonderful to be husband and wife! Hours-newly weds. It is such a fabulous time, ladies. Please savor your hours and minutes during your big day.

I could have danced all night!!!!

The ALWAYS treacherous SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE circle....

But Kerri and her date showed us ALL how its done...

TIP #2: No matter what goes wrong, just savor the good moments. You'll be happy you did and be happy when you look back. Little glitches are a part of life. And just like life, your wedding won't be perfect. It's how you perceive and handle the bumps in the road that makes for positive experiences. (Gag, sorry to sound like Dr. Phil.) Enjoy the little (and big) moments!

I did a last minute bouquet toss. I didn't think I wanted to, but thought, Hey why not?! Samantha, who is married (haha!) got the bouquet. Later, BM Abby rescued it from her clutches and gave it back to me to dry and save.

The night was too short! The lights went up at midnight, and we were a bit sad to see it over. BUT we continued the party in the bar of the hotel! We met up with everyone for drinks, pool, and some carrying on.

But we were EXHAUSTED!! We went back to our room, realized that I hadn't done the photobooth, and so Mr. P (my new husband!) and I took some before we went to bed...and passed out!!!

Sidenote: We were so tired, that we slept through most of our send-off breakfast the next morning. We missed almost all of our guests, even my mom and family had gone. We got there at the tail end to see people leaving. Mr. P's parents and some aunts were there. So we had a very quiet breakfast. Some friends stopped by to say goodbye. I regret not getting up sooner! But, heck, I enjoyed the sleeping in with my husband.

And with that, we gathered our things and said goodbye to the Homestead and went home to pack for our honeymoon!

IT WAS FABULOUS! WE WERE WAS SO HAPPY! WE HAD THE REAL VERSION OF THE WEDDING OF OUR DREAMS. And I wouldn't change a thing (okay, except for maybe the cake!).

TIP #3: Don't look back and say, "Would have, could have, should have." Your day is/was your day. Appreciate it for all that it lacked as well as for all it was meant to be.

And so, almost a year later, Mr. P and I are heading down to the Homestead this weekend to celebrate with a new top tier cake, year old macarons, and some great memories!!!

****************************

Macarons and Marie: Welcome Dinner and Everything's Gonna Be Alright

2010-05-17T20:58:00.000-07:00

After our confusing(!) rehearsal, I was so ready for our welcome dinner. This would be the first opportunity for us to see most of our guests. I was a little nervous and excited all at once! But most of all, I couldn't wait to eat and relax a little! We were in the home stretch; we had no more details to accomplish. We could just relax and look forward to the next day.

{Images via various friends, camera phones, and our impromptu documentarian, Graham}

Ah, relaxing a little...after the fun(ky) rehearsal!

Mr. P's parents' hosted the event and felt strongly that, since ours was a bit of destination wedding, any of the guests who came to town the night before should be invited to the dinner. They are very social people and this gave them an opportunity to mingle with their siblings (P's parents have five or so siblings each!) and friends (as well as meet our friends).

It was very generous of them to throw the welcome dinner for us, and I was happy to sit back and let all happen on its own--one less (big) thing I had to worry about. However, I was a little worried that it might be *too* much fuss (aka require additional work for me and Mr. P).

But it eventually worked out, as it always does...

Excited to see our guests...some of whom I just met for the first time

...There were only minor moments of awkwardness (Please note: this is not an itemization of my ungratefulness. I'm just documenting the real and funny foibles of the weekend):

- Flowers. The week leading up to the weekend, I kept getting calls from the florist asking about my MIL's plans for the flowers for the welcome dinner. I had no idea what they were or why she wasn't returning calls to them--it was her event. And I don't say that grudgingly; I honestly thought that it was her event to plan, and was happy about that fact. I refused to pester MIL. I think she ended up finalizing stuff with the florist like the day before. I didn't really care and didn't have time to fret about it. Again, it worked out.

The flowers turned out fine

- Seating plan. Also, the week before, we had run the seating plan for the wedding dinner by them. They okay-ed it and then got it into their heads that they wanted a plan for the welcome dinner. And they assumed I'd do it. Grrr. The only direction MIL gave was that there should be two tables...ON THE STAGE...one of which was for us and the bridal party and the second table would be for the bridal party's significant others. Did I mention on stage? Yes, there's a stage in the barn because it is actually a chamber music venue, complete with overhead microphones. So I think the thinking was, we're the guests of honor and we should be on display. Our eyebrows were raised a little at this thought, but heck, it would be good practice for (being the center of attention) the next day.

The STAGE was literally set (just go with it)

- Place cards. There was this moment when Mr. P and I knew that his parents were not thinking strategically about how to organize a large group such as this. Meaning, they wanted a seating plan, but didn't plan on how to inform people where to sit. No table numbers, name cards, directions, etc. Again, we were busy with the million other details for the main event. Would it be bad if we didn't say anything (as we were so tempted not to because we were exhausted, and scared at the real possibility that we'd have more work to do than necessary)? Having heard nothing about it, we ultimately asked them several days before how they planned on handling that. And of course, then MIL asked if I could do the name cards. I sighed one late night at the office...and did a really quick and dirty label merge, and then gave it to an office assistant (shhh) to print, cut, and fold.

Not too bad for last minute and make-shift place cards

- Seating chart. But there remained the issue of the table numbers and how the guests would know where to sit. Mr. P's mom is a very enthusiastic person and many, many ideas come to her and then she forgets previously important ones. So seating chart/table numbers were left by the wayside for a discussion on what she wanted to have as favors. Favors?! Anyway, we kept silent as long as we could. And when we saw them that morning and gave them the place cards, we asked how they would manage getting people to the table. They had no idea. But Mr. P's dad, being a very aware man, just said, "Not to worry, I'll take care of it." And it was taken care of, quickly, practically and simply (although my last name was spelled wrong)--hahahaha! Also, I don't recall table numbers, so I'm not sure how people got there.

The favors (handmade dark chocolates from a shop Mr. P's hometown)

The last minute seating chart...with my name spelled wrong--there are two T's in my last name (But I'm sure no one/everyone noticed).

Tip #1: No one is *more* focused on the details and logistics of your big day/weekend than you. Don't get your panties in a wad if your ILs don't get it perfect for the welcome dinner...because they are not project managers and do not have bride brain. And all will still be fine!

We mingled with the guests, our old friends met our new friends, and our family members reunited and got acquainted over light appetizers and drinks...it was so nice and casual and not fussy! (Even good old Father Jim had a great time!)

Tip #2: The rehearsal and welcome dinner are just practice. Who cares if they don't go as planned. Just hope for the best, enjoy yourself, and relax. Sure your wedding day might be a disaster, not saying mine was, but try to squeeze out as much fun as you can!

We sat down and as we started on our meal, Mr. P and I passed around the bridal party gifts: handmade cuff links for the guys, bridesmaids brooches and earrings with monogrammed stationery for the ladies.

We had a really nice meal by Chef Randy Weisch. Locally foraged mushroom tartlets, beef tenderloin... even the roast chicken and Chevre were good! And strawberry shortcake. Delicious, local country classics.

As people got comfortable and were finishing their meals, Mr. P got up to give a speech he had prepared. (So cute, can you see the notes in his hand?)

I giggled listening to him, thanking me for saying 'Yes' and thanking our guest for coming. One of the groomsmen, A, pushed me up to join Mr. P. But I hadn't prepared anything. I started off with "I like to speak off the cuff...because I like to make a fool out of myself." I went on to fill the silent, cricket-chirping room with a round of thank you's to Father Jim (bien sur), Mr. P's parents, and introduced my bridesmaids (each with a funny story--my sister apparently and thankfully thought it was hysterical).

Not to be outdone, Mr. P's father gave a speech (I don't remember what about, but he loves to give speeches), and brought Chef Randy out to thank him in front of the guests. He really did do such a great job. People clapped obligingly (I suspect many were very tired having traveled that day). So that was the end of dinner around 10pm.

But the night was still young...

Some die-hards joined us for drinks back at the hotel President's Bar. Knowing that the downstairs sports pub would open up at midnight (there was another wedding party down there doing some pre-wedding celebrating themselves), we hung on for more. In retrospect, I'm not sure that was a good idea given we were to be married the next day, but oh well.

When we got down to the Player's Pub, everyone decided it was a good idea to show off their dance moves. The best part was when our German friend, Uhlens, walked in gleefully muttering to himself "Ahhh, a discotheque!" To this day, Mr. P and I say "Ooooh, deeescotekk!" to each other when we see dancing happening.

It was 2am by the time we finished. Again, that probably did not help my fatigue and skin situation, but we just wanted to savor every single moment we could! Notice my sister in the background...she was clearly savoring something! Hahaha! (She's going to kill me.)

Tip #3: You should sleep. But if you can't, by all means, spend as much time with your friends and family as you can. Savor every moment with them. It's not often that you get to see them all in one place like this.

Everything thus far was fine (enough) and it was going to be fine. That's all we could hope for. There was nothing left to do but show up! So we went off to bed, SO giddy and excited for our big day. I hardly slept a wink!!! Next up...our wedding morning.

**********

Previously:

Macarons and Mari é : The Rehearsal and a Little 'Uh Oh, Should I Be Concerned?'

Macarons and Marié : The Tea Ceremony, Half-Baked
Macarons and Marié: Assembly Required
Macarons and Marié: The Gathering
Macarons and Marié: The Highlights
Macarons and Marié: Last Minute, Low Key Bachelorette

Macarons and Marie : The Rehearsal and a little 'Uh Oh, Should I Be Concerned?'

2010-05-14T11:26:00.000-07:00

I'll just start by saying, some things you can't control. Like, for example, your officiant, who at the rehearsal leaves you with more questions than answers and a strong feeling that things will probably go a bit awry come wedding day...JUST SAYIN'.

Also, this is another long post. Sorry! (All images by our friend, Graham, and other wedding guests.)

That's the look of "Oh boy, this is going to be interesting." Father Jim in the background still telling a story.

So, it's still the Friday, the day before the wedding. We just finished with our (half-baked) tea ceremony, and we rushed back to our rooms to change for the rehearsal in the garden. People were still arriving at that point--and by "people" I mean our bridal party. I should have been worried that they might be late (have I mentioned I'm Type B?), but I just told them to show up around 4-ish (the rehearsal was to start at 4:30). Promptness, as we will find out at the wedding, is a HUGE sticking point for our officiant, Father Jim.

Tip #1: Buffer time. Add at least 30 minutes to any activity for late arrivals and dilly-dallying.

Father Jim is 80 something years old, a little stubborn, a lot crotchety, and loves his Scotch. He also likes to spin a good yarn. He'll tell the same story, over and over and over. He is such a character and we love him. He's a family friend, and coincidentally presided over a congregation there in Hot Springs years ago, so knows everyone at the Homestead well. He's also very demanding and was adamant about who controls the rehearsal: him.

That meant our clear-thinking coordinator, Esme, had to watch her step and not say much (she knows Father Jim well). That also meant he was the one who was supposed dole out instructions and cues--but he skipped over all that and just told stories of other weddings and their mishaps. Like the time the ring was put into an officiant's hand, who promptly keeled over, still clutching the ring. Nice! It's funny now, and it was actually very comical then, to hear him go on! Perhaps I should have been more concerned. Again: Type B I am.

Here's how it went down:

Everyone arrived. Giddy and all smiles. It was really bright out, and I was a little concerned about the heat and squinting that might happen on wedding day (but still so excited and happy!). However as the afternoon sun started to set, it morphed into the perfect light.

Details of the garden and the eventual slightly overcast light. Perfect.

The ceremony site: The Spa Garden. Esme had just the first row set up for the rehearsal, and made name cards for our important guests. Graham is the (now) fiance of Michelle, who read at the wedding. So while Father Jim was "in charge," Esme made sure things happened.

Tip #2: Make sure you have a GREAT wedding coordinator, and make sure she's there for the rehearsal (even if she's just a DOC).

Places everyone! We worked backwards, starting with the ceremony. Esme making recommendations for where to put the table for the Eucharist.

My input on where things should go...

But Father Jim (and his cane) had the final say! Then we asked where Michelle, our reader, was to stand. "What reader?" Asked Father Jim. Grrr, the one we told you about. [All the way] "Over there," says Father Jim. But you can't hear her from there. "Okay, you can move in a little closer, honey."

Michelle was not amused.

But BMs O and E (cousin and sister, respectively) were definitely amused, chuckling the whole time. I had no idea what to think.

Having straightened all that out, the procession walk-through began. First up, mother of the groom with brother M, the best man. (My mother would be escorting me.)

Father Jim happily presiding...

After all three groomsmen, the Groom!!! Mr. P's parents looking on as if they're thinking "Finally, there he goes!"

All the guys lined up! In the top picture, Mr. P is scratching his collar as if to say "Is it me or is hot in here?" And groomsman, B, seems to be saying "This is going to get gooooood!" Then the ladies start walking in...I like all the guys' expressions!

I believe it was for my sister as she strutted in...[cue sexy 70s bass music] bow-chicka-bow-bow.

This is a family show! Next up, the kiddies: Mr. P's niece and nephew (aka flower girl and ring-bearer)

And finally, me and my mom. "Stand right here," says Esme, taking the chance to put some order into things. "I'll cue the music, and fluff your train, then you'll be ready." Her bossy-ness was reassuring. Note that my mom has her arm in mine. I knew that I'd have to hold up my gown to walk the next day, so that was on purpose. And I really didn't care that things were going a little haphazardly at the rehearsal, I was feeling happy!

This part is interesting. Father Jim goes quickly through the "presentation by the parent" part...but does a sort of "yada yada yada". My mom wasn't sure what cue she should take for hugging me and sitting down. This is important, and will play out rather strangely in the real ceremony. So, after yada yada, hug daughter. Got it.

"Dearly beloved...and so and so forth, yada, yada." Ooookay! This will also play out in an interesting way next day!

Then somehow we moved on to the Eucharist part...which, clearly, Mr. P was bored by. Classic!

I love this picture. My sister is saying something to the effect of "This is going to be alllll jacked up." And somehow I just laughed. Because really, how messed up can it be? At the end of the (next day), we'll be married and that's what's important.

Tip #3: Perspective. Chill, ladies, chill. It should be a happy experience, and not necessarily a perfect one. You risk missing the experience of the true meaning of your day if you get caught up in perfection.

Mr. P (who is most definitely Type A) was also not worried.

And with that, we joined hands, and walked back up the aisle!

...with our dear friends and family behind us...

And afterwards, Esme debriefed us, trying to instill some sort of order. The guys laughed, the girls listened intently, and the kids played and posed for pictures...

Then we were off to our Welcome Dinner at the Garth Newell Music Center barn!!! And I couldn't wait.

While we were rehearsing, almost all of the 80 or so guests showed up that night for the dinner. See more in the next post!

**********
Previously:

Macarons and Marie: The Tea Ceremony, Half-Baked

2010-04-29T14:20:00.000-07:00

We left off with me and Mr. Perfume delivering the welcome bags and assembling the macaron favors. It's still Friday and our tea ceremony (I'll generically call it just a tea ceremony, as it was more confusion than a real Vietnamese dam hoi) was on for 3:00pm. A dam hoi is an 'asking' or engagement ceremony. This is less a story about the ceremony and more about the give and take (and mis-communication) that comes with a mother's involvement in wedding planning.

I don't know where to start with this. Many of you won't be able to identify with this tradition, but just as many will know what I'm talking about when I say my mother was totally frustrating! First, it was her strong desire to have something to honor this part of our heritage. That's fine. But somewhere along the way, she just thought it would happen. On its own. Or that I'd figure it out--me, who barely speaks Vietnamese and is embarrassingly estranged from the culture (judge me not). Anyway, I didn't want anything elaborate. I had asked my mother several times to explain how it works. Mind you, she is NOT good at explaining. ANYTHING. God love her, she is a great mom and a sweet woman, but hell, she cannot explain her way out of a bag! Anyway, I had asked her many times: Please tell me step-by-step what we need to do, what things we need to organize, what we need to purchase. I always got some meandering story and little bits of inconsistent details. Actually, I'm not even sure she really even knew what goes into it.

I did some research, and apparently there are several parts that are executed, four to be exact: The procession, the candle ceremony, the bedazzling (kidding, the gift of jewelry) ceremony, and the tea ceremony. There are symbolic items and foods involved. I won't bore you with the details, but let's just say it is very, very involved. (Miss Hot Wings does a great post on the real deal.)We didn't really have time, and given that my mom was seemingly non-chalant and non-communicative (yet insistent), I thought, what the heck, I'll just do the tea ceremony part. I believed what was important to her was connecting to Mr. P's family. There was this weird cultural tension that was obvious. In her culture, the groom's family pays for the wedding, gives gifts to the bride's family and offers up a lot of deferential words and stuff. My mom had on more than one occasion passive-aggressively mentioned this. But how would Mr. P's parents know what to do? So I made up a wiki explanation sheet for them, copied the hell out of Mrs. Hot Cocoa's very nice description of her Chinese tea ceremony (they're all the same, kind of, right? Kidding aside, the Vietnamese borrow a lot from the Chinese) and that was that.

It was basically supposed to go like this: Mr. P and I serve our parents and elders tea, Mr. P's dad serves my mom tea, and somewhere in there Mr. P's mom was supposed to give mine a li xi (red envelope of money given on auspicious occasions) all the while uttering magnanimous, wise and joyful words. When I asked her about a special tea set or any other acoutrements, she just said we could use whatever (that whatever would be tea bags and the hotel's convention-style hot water urn that was placed in the next room.) How it would go down, in what order, I had no idea. I tried to coordinate with my mom. (But that's impossible, she has a terrible memory and did I mention was not really frustrating?) In the end it was a little choppy and a lot awkward, but my mom was happy that she got her due deference and pictures of us in traditional dress.

Oh, did I mention the traditional dress? Well, let me tell you. The ao dai is the traditional dress for women: a long, fitted tunic over palazzo pants. It's really pretty and comes in all sorts of different flowing fabrics and colors. But brides are supposed to wear red. Somehow my mother didn't really tell me this. She said white would be fine...a white ao dai with a giant gilded phoenix and dragon emblazened on the front would do juuuust fine she said. (If you are Vietnamese and you know how this is supposed to go, you are probably laughing right now.) Anyhoo, that dress--it was purchased. But my mom insisted on making my groom's outfit. A blue male version of the ao dai with double semi-Asian-looking symbols all over it. Mr. P was happy to wear it. And I must say, he looked quite dashing in it, albeit totally uncomfortable. I think Mr. P's parents were amused. Moving on, so basically we reserved the Hunt Room at the hotel and had a traditional (as in Anglo traditional) afternoon tea catered. My mom brought along egg rolls for the chef to fry up and serve. That was the only semi-heritage item. Actually, it wasn't traditional for the dam hoi at all; it was just something she likes to make and that would be her contribution. Random. Sigh.

So it was up to me to MC the thing. So I did what I do best, speak extemporaneously, making stuff up as I went along, trying to maintain some fidelity to the tradition, but figured, it was a no win situation-- since I only had the Chinese Cliff notes version memorized (see Hot Cocoa above)-- that I should just maintain us much grace and dignity as possible as my mom sat there happy, blithely content in being surrounded by family new and old. I was a bit annoyed that it was a bit of a crap shoot and fly-by-the-seat of your pants situation, as I still had the rehearsal and the rehearsal dinner that afternoon and evening to think of. It was so half-baked, half-arsed and sloppily executed. But she was happy. And you brides out there who have mothers who have insisted on some aspect of your wedding that you either didn't agree with or didn't plan on, but in the end did it...for her...you'll be happy that you did looking back. Because she's your mother. And you love her, despite all her shortcomings and frustrating character traits, because she raised you and cared for you and that's the least you could do to show her some gratitude (but you probably won't blog about it for the world to read). Ma, if you're reading this, you know I heart you!

Here's the pictoral play-by-play:

Waiting. Photog, Werner Gattinger, service guy, and Mr. P. Mom and family were late.

(All images, with the exception of this one by me are by Werner Gattinger)

Mom and family arrive. Hug time (not official part of ceremony)!

Me trying to explain the ritual. That's the "I have no idea what I'm talking about" face that I'm wearing.

First up: Mr. P's father. Preparing tea for my mom.

Mr. P's dad offers the tea to my mom; she accepts; he says a few words of happiness to have me in the family; my mom says thanks...lots of thanks. To Mr. P's dad, the family, and everyone in the room.

Then it was our turn. At the last minute, like the night before we were to leave, my mom asked if we had the wine. Huh? We had plenty of wine, as we supplied our own and paid corkage, and even brought some for the room. We used one of the bottle from our room.

Mr. P served my mom, as I served his parents the wine.

Cheers!!

Then, more tea! This time we prepared cups for everyone.

We served everyone by order of age: Parents, older siblings, friends, and younger cousin.

Then there was the red envelope (li xi) exchange. Mr. P's mom gave my mom the special envelope that contained money (a nominal bit, just $8--eight is apparently lucky). She said she was really happy that her son was finally getting married. She's hilarious!

Then my mom gave the envelope to us. (We eventually put the envelope with the $8 in our memory box!)

Mr. P's mom then surprised us with a little gift. It was a hand-carved plaque that was given to her on her wedding day by her family.

We thanked everybody and invited everyone to eat...

...as we took portraits.

You know, looking back on the day through the lens of these images, it was lovely. No, it wasn't perfect, not even close. Yes, I was annoyed, but it was meaningful and I'm glad we did it.

Do you have anything that you're not fully on board with in terms of your wedding and your parents' desires? Will you go through with whatever it is, despite your own reservations?

Next up: The rehearsal and welcome dinner!

**********
Previously:
Macarons and Marié: Assembly Required
Macarons and Marié: The Gathering
Macarons and Marié: The Highlights
Macarons and Marié: Last Minute, Low Key Bachelorette

Macarons and Marie : Assembly Required (a day and a half ahead)

2010-04-19T22:36:00.000-07:00

Grrrr. Writing recaps is SO hard, especially when it's much more interesting to read all the fresh ideas from all the fresh new Bees and all the fabulous recent weddings in the hive! But, I'm determined to get this all done by our one year anniversary, which is fast approaching! I don't think I'll do a ton of recaps, just a handful of really long posts. So warning: this is tediously long! Sorry!

So we left off with that Wednesday before the wedding, where we gathered and packed everything for the trip down to Hot Springs/The Homestead. As I mentioned, to maximize efficiency for car travel, we packed a lot of things flat and un-assembled, which meant assembly required!

Tip #1, If you're planning a destination wedding or planning from afar, be sure to add at least an additional day and a half at your location to give yourself time to assemble your details, especially if you have a lot of them.

THURSDAY

Last road trip as singles

That Thursday, the travel day, was a bit overcast but beautifully mild in the 70s. Perfect for the morning drive down to our destination. After a three and a half hour drive, we arrived in Bath County. Our first critical stop was the florist--we had to give them the silver ice buckets to fill for the centerpieces!

Mountain Laurel Creations: Tiny country flower shop

Our vintage sterling vessels--I had previously put labels on the bottom of each to indicate on which table they should sit.

Gloria and Debi of Mountain Laurel Creations--the tiny little start-up flower shop just outside of Hot Springs--were there waiting, with the flowers for the wedding all sorted and ready to be arranged.

Various elements for the centerpieces and bouquets: Peonies, ranunculus, hydrangeas, anemones, seeded eucalyptis, veronica, astilbe, wheat

Again, it's a very small operation. But I must say, what they lack in slickness, they make up for in effort. (Recall I had flower sticker shock from a bigger, more seasoned, but way more expensive operation that the hotel recommended. And in the end decided to try my luck with these ladies). They're so small that they didn't even have certain basic wedding elements. Way back I asked if they had large planter urns and some sort of column pedestal (flower arrangements for the altar area at the ceremony), but they didn't. However, after I sent some pictures of what I was going for, they went ahead and found some and invested in resin ones (so no additional costs for me). They had a local artist faux age them! Here are the sweet ladies of Mountain Laurel Creations standing next to one of the urn-column things.

The urn and pedestals for our garden altar; Debi and Gloria of Mountain Laurel Creations

AND, recall I also was in search of Amnesia roses, which are a) hard to source (Gloria had never heard of them) and b) apparently don't look that great in real life--although they photograph well. We had originally agreed on some pink Esperanza roses (at the advice of Gloria), though I really wanted the Amnesia. When I arrived, I was surprised with a bunch of the Amnesia. Gloria had found someone last minute who could get them to her and she wanted to give me the option. I went with them after we took them outside to get a good look at them!!! Now that's customer service. They were so reasonably priced, too.

Amnesia Roses

Tip #2: Don't be afraid to use small, local start-up businesses! They're eager to please!

Moving on. Our next most pressing concern was to a) get those delicate macarons to Esmé (the coordinator) to put into the resort's refrigerator and b) do a quick run-through of events and walk-through of the garden area with her.

The garden for our ceremony; Mr. P and Esmé

We then checked into our suite. It was wonderful with plenty of room (bedroom, sitting room, sun room) for us and all our wedding junk!

We also had the use of a small conference room, the Madison room, where we could lock up valuables like silver candlesticks and the like. It's also the place where we put together the macarons (I had baked the shells and traveled with them un-assembled), deciding it would be easier to transport them without them filled. There's no way we could have done that in our room.

Tip #3: If you are assembling a bunch of stuff, make sure there's a place to do it! If it's going to be in your suite, make sure there's a lot of space--you want your wedding night to be serene and clutter-free! (My tips are so obvious and useless!)

We were exceptionally busy that night. We mounted the faux-to booth and escort card boards onto foam core boards; arranged the escort card names on the board...

...put together the welcome bags (again, they were packed flat to maximize transport space); and rolled and wrapped the programs in ribbon. As the night wore on and I got more tired, I became more resourceful (i.e. in taking short-cuts) and started to care less.

Mr. P stuffing the welcome bags; the finished bags--I realized very soon that we might not have enough ribbon and that it was too difficult to tie bows, so I just made knots and the loose ends made ersatz bows; similarly I got tired of making bows around the programs, so I created one-loop pulls with the ribbon, which actually worked out better.

It took forever. I remember feeling really light-headed from not eating very much (you won't feel like eating for all the anxiety and excitement!). It was pretty late by the time we were finished, but we knew we had to get some nourishment, so we went over to Sam Snead's tavern. We were exhausted when we got to sleep.

Sam Snead's Tavern for some sustanance

Tip #4: For goodness sake, eat something...to avoid being light-headed and a cranky beyouch.

FRIDAY

We were up at the crack of dawn and were ready to distribute the welcome bags. Not all the guests stayed at the Homestead. Some stayed in the next town over, Warm Springs at various B&Bs, motel, and even an art gallery loft! So we had to drive around the county dropping them off! For those at the hotel, we just left them with the bell hop who had a list of our guests.

Welcome bag delivery and country critter friends

After dropping them off, it was back to the hotel to the Madison room to put together the macarons! They had kept well and had thawed (as they were previously frozen) perfectly. This is where I got lazy--instead of making the filling (no time!!) I just used grapefruit marmalade for the pink ones and ginger for the green ones. (The ginger was gross!) I also realized that only one macaron would fit into the box. I had planned on two each (why didn't I check before hand?!), so half of all those pesky, pain-in-the-arse cookies weren't used! (But I later found out, like six months later, that MIL had taken them home and put them in her freezer! Will have to try them on our anniversary?)

Macaron assembly--lazy jam filling and a single sad cookie

We didn't make a timeline, only a list of major things we had to get done by X time. There was no way we could anticipate, say, how long it would take to deliver the bags or put together the macarons. (Note: I say "we" and Mr. P helping in the images above. I can honestly say that we shared in this endeavor and without his practical execution skills, our wedding would be just a box of my ideas.) I think keeping it flexible with plenty of buffer time (say two big tasks per day or something like that) kept the stress levels at bay, so I wasn't always looking at the clock or feeling flustered for not meeting a time marker).

Tip #5: You don't have to go nuts over a timeline, especially if you're type B like me. It'll fall into place if you know ahead of time the major tasks that need to be done and in what order. Again, buffer time.

By the time we were done, we were starving, but the Vietnamese Tea Ceremony was to start at 3:30, so we just relaxed for about an hour and a half before we got ready for that...the rehearsal, and the rehearsal dinner!

Next up, the Tea Ceremony!!!

**********

Previously:

Macarons and Marié: The Gathering
Macarons and Marié: The Highlights
Macarons and Marié: Last Minute, Low Key Bachelorette

Macarons and Marie: The Gathering

2010-03-03T11:13:00.000-08:00

I've had so many false starts and promises to you guys to start my recaps. I did the honeymoon and a sprinkling of this and that. And now it's almost 10 months since our wedding, and I *still* haven't done any recaps. Until now. I regret not doing them sooner, as some of my memories have faded. If you're documenting your own wedding, do yourself a favor and don't wait. Try to remember as much as you can and write it down. It goes by so fast!

If you don't recall, I'm Mrs. Perfume, and I got married last May on the same day as the lovely Mrs. Taffy and Mrs. Peeptoe, who have been way more diligent with their recaps than I have. So, Hi, again!

But before we get to the Big Day, I'll start with the events of the days before the wedding. Warning: This is tedious, boring stuff, but it got documented, and I want to remember it, as well as show you the level of effort involved in getting all the elements together for the big day. The only thing I really remember is feeling consistently exhausted, excited, and light-headed.

As you may recall (or not), it was a busy weekend before the wedding, making the final batch of macarons, getting together their packaging, taking a dance lesson as well as finalizing these:

The program and other paper goods, including the menus, escort cards/board, faux-to booth poster, table cards, etc. They all had to be organized and packed with maximum space and organizational efficiency for the four-hour car ride to our destination.

Lindsey, who did the invitations, and I stayed up for several nights in a row, like until 3 am, in a rush to get these together. We went through the programs line, by line, by line. Again, did I mention exhausted? She was a trooper. We communicated on g-chat the whole time. The menus were a bit easier and looked very much like the invitations.

Everything was organized into zip lock bags by table. Table "numbers" (recall the vintage-looking destination post cards) and place cards (color coordinated to meal type) were all put together so it would be easy for our coordinator to execute. Along with two copies of the seating chart (one for the coordinator and one for the florist).

Everything had to travel flat. So any assembling, say like the welcome bags and the macaron favors and their packaging, had to be done at the hotel.

Our dining room was the staging area where we gathered all that had to go with us. Poster board (for the faux-to booth poster and escort card board, as you'll see below), ring pillow, rehearsal tissue bouquet. Everything.

Earlier that week, I got the Moo cards of the destination images for the escort cards. Moo is awesome, by the way. Each card specified a 'destination' table (with related image of us at said destination). The card went into an envelope made up pieces of a 'Welcome' escort card board.

The poster itself was rolled up and each individual card was numbered on the back for easy assembly. Our friend, Cary, helped us by cutting up the larger image and adhering pieces onto the individual envelopes. Thank goodness we got help on this. It was, again, the week of that it finally came together! He even wrote out a map for us. All I had to do was put the name of the guest on the front, coordinate their table 'destination' with the right image/card.

Similarly, our 'faux-to' booth poster (made by the lovely Mrs. Cupcake) was printed out at work (shhhh) and rolled up to be dry mounted on poster board after arriving at the hotel.

For the centerpieces, we wanted all vintage and antique sterling. So we used what we had and borrowed candlesticks, ice buckets and wine coasters from G's parents. I also ended up going to my local junk store, Ruff and Ready, to find three more pieces, which included silver (though not sterling) tea pots and a water pitcher.

Afterwards, G polished all the pieces and I organized them into table groupings, with the name of the table at the bottom of each piece. This would eventually go to the florists to fill and place on the tables.

We ran out of silver center pieces, so I used an old porcelain urn (that my neighbor had thrown out!) and these antique Limoges candlesticks that G's mom gave him as a gift years ago. It would be the one for our sweetheart table.

For the petal toss, I cut in half large doilies, which were later rolled and secured to create a cone by the BMs the day of the wedding. Again, traveling flat was key.

Finally, I gathered all the gifts for the BMs, our reader, the flower girl, and the ring bearer. The kids got candy and fun work books. The ladies got hilarious tongue-in-cheek little books, handmade monogrammed stationery (by the awesome Paulette at Paper Nosh), candy, and the jewelry for their dresses.

That Tuesday, before my last day at work, my colleagues surprised me with a little party at M&S grill (and a gift card--someone even left a ratty $20 bill in the card!). I couldn't eat a thing. Just the salad. And the cake...it was delicious, but again, could.not.eat. (Btw, it's no lie that you lose tons of weight right before your wedding.)

And that Wednesday night, we had dinner at Corduroy, where we had dinner after the proposal over a year earlier. We sat at the same table. I had grilled Branzino and we shared some sort of chocolate dessert. We were coming down the home stretch. Things were gathered and packed. And the next day, we were off!

Advice Mondays: Mini Champers as wedding favors. Which one?

2010-01-04T20:07:00.000-08:00

Source

Sorry for the LOOOONG hiatus, my awesome readers! But I'm back. I will start my recaps again soon, sharing with you the programs, menu, and other things.

But in the meantime, I just wanted to open up the blog to questions. I have been getting a few advice inquiries, and I thought it would be helpful to share.

Yen wrote:

"Hello!

I am a fan of your blog. I am having problems picking a champagne and I know that you and your hubby are really well versed in wine.

I'm looking to give my guests a 187ml bottle of champage.. but I don't know which ones are good.

I didn't want to get something cheapo! Any suggestions??

Thanks!!

your fan,

--
Yen"

********************

Happy new year, Yen. Nice to hear from you.

Regarding half splits of Champagne, if you want true Champagne, Pommery [Pop series] and Perrier Jouet [Grand Brut] both make 187 ml bottles, and are elegant choices that aren't too expensive!! Great idea!

Please feel free to email me with questions! I'm happy to provide answers if I have them!!! Roganista@gmail.com

Macarons and Marie': Last Minute, Low-key Bachelorette Gathering

2009-10-27T19:58:00.000-07:00

Notice I used the word "gathering". It wasn't a party. There were no themes, plastic phalluses, matching tank tops with sparkly wordz, games, and most of all no plans. There was no time. On the Saturday before the wedding, there was so much to do, including that dance lesson and baking the last batch of macarons.

I was a little sad earlier in the week when I thought that I would miss this rite of passage (though I never envisioned a traditional bachelorette party). No one was really game, and plus we already had the couples pre-wedding non-shower party and my bridal shower.

But last minute, my sister came down from New York, and a few friends who happened to be around rallied.

I just wanted something low-key, to eat my favorite foods, relax, and enjoy a casual farewell to single-hood (and to some extent the activities of my youth?) celebration. This is what you call an old lady's bachelorette party.

It started off at my favorite neighborhood eatery, Hank's Oyster Bar, with my sister and friend, Andrea.

Eileen came to join us as we sat down for a light dinner on the patio.

My favorite food in the world is fries...and oysters...and Champagne. The combination is amazing. I wouldn't typically indulge in this (combo). And a week before the wedding -- it could have been a bad situation. But we were celebrating, so I took the risk.

It was such a beautiful evening. We decided to go to Adams Morgan to have drinks on the rooftop of Perry's, one of my favorite bars.

Michelle joined us at that point.

And we enjoyed some sparkling blanc de noir...

The gentlemen there found our "bachelorette" party amusing.

One young man--we'll call him, Vince (because he looked and sounded like a young Vince Vaughn)-- was very entertaining! He regaled us with stories of the Midwest and his hard-living ways. See demonstration below.

He hung around for a little while, and when someone asked, "What are you, in to Asian chicks or something?" He held up his Sapporo and said, "Who IIIIIISN'T?!" Oh, boy....but I honestly think this little Irishman did not actually have the Fever. He was just indulging a bunch of cougars.

The ladies went home around 1am and left my sister and me to fend for ourselves. Don't ask me what she's doing. I have no idea.

My last indulgence was a late night jumbo slice. I hadn't done that in YEARS.

It was so gross!

The next morning my sister left, sans hangover, and gave me a rehearsal bouquet she made out of the tissue and ribbon from the bridal shower. Perfect.

Au revoir bachelorette-dom!!!

La Dolce Vita Honeymoon Part 3: Venice, You'll Either Love it or Hate It

2009-10-13T09:20:00.000-07:00

"Maybe some other time of year, Venice."

Recall in the previous installment, I dropped the camera doing my signature side-veritas shots in Portofino. Idiot. But there was still one more city--Venice--on our itinerary. How sad would it be to not capture Venice for posterity? Well, maybe not that sad. The problem was the lcd panel on the camera wasn't working -- so we couldn't see what we were taking pictures of. I didn't want to buy another camera, but I didn't want to miss the rest of our honeymoon either! So I took my chances and snapped images randomly. Most were blurry... as the macro function was on (so only close-ups were clear).

Maybe it didn't matter. Because, I gotta say, we were loathe to be in Venice. The first thing that hits you is the chaotic, giant parking lot filled with confused tourists waiting to get on the water taxis. We stayed in the Academia area of the lagoon. It was quiet and peaceful, I must say. But on our last night there, a water main broke, and we couldn't shower. They gave us bottled water. So we washed our faces and did a sort of towel bath. How romantic.

Moving on...ostensibly, we were there to see the art biennale, but the crowds were crushing and it had the overall feel of a giant tourist trap with watered down menus. There were actually signs that read, "Menu Touristico". Really. So we spent most of our two days there hiding in back alleyways and coming out at dusk. Like vampires, I guess. But the crowds were non-existent early morning and early evening.

Doesn't Mr. P's face say it all?

I will say that the light was always perfect. Here, I am on Plaza San Marco the second evening. It was actually quiet, and images of Katherine Hepburn in 'Summertime' flashed before my eyes.

We also went to the Peggy Guggenheim, which was just a few steps away from our hotel. And it was lovely. Here we are on the museum's veranda (as captured through the lense of a busted camera.) And one afternoon, on a way back alley, we found a little spot, with no one around and no menu touristico. The food was magnificent. Here's a salad of grilled octopus with orange and fennel.

And on our last night there, we had a nice meal on the patio in a neighborhood close to ours...

...which included a little ravioli

...and Champagne. We learned to like the spumantes and Perseccos, but there's nothing like the real deal. Sacrilege, perhaps, given we were in Italy. But we were at that point tired and a bit disappointed (though still basking in our newly married status), and needed some comfort...

I think we need to go back to Venice one Fall. The locals say that it's the best time of year, as the tourists wind down and things are still open. So, perhaps, on some anniversary, we will get to see Venice for all its beauty.

Overall, I really enjoyed our honeymoon. Mr. P did a great job. We relaxed, recuperated, and enjoyed some wonderful food and memories!

*****

HIGHLIGHTS (for those who are interested):

BELLAGIO

1. Hotel Florence for accomodations and dinner

2. Mistral for dinner. The one Michelin-starred restaurant has a great 6-7 course tasting menu and the service is definitely professional.

3. Bilacus for dinner. Okay food; very romantic ambience. Get the corner table overlooking the steps.

4. Villa Balbianello. A must see.

5. The point. A back area above the town where the locals live and you can get a glimpse of the bay and village life. Very sweet.

ITALIAN RIVIERA

1. Santa Margarita Ligure. Stay in this town rather than Portofino, as it is a little more exciting and less expensive.

2. Grande Hotel Miramare. Great views of the ocean, its own beach club, old school charm, great service.

3. Eat along any of sidewalk places to people watch.

4. Manuelina in Recco. An out of the way place in an ugly town with FABULOUS food. Family-owned, it's where the locals go. And they invented the famous focaccia formaggio. Out of this world.

5. Market in Camogli. Just visit Camogli. It's beautiful in a non-glamorous way.

6. Portofino. Stay at the Splendido if your pockets are heavy. They'll be lightened tremendously. Great shopping. A little touristy.

VENICE

1. Skip it. Just kidding.

2. Get lost in the vast maze of alleys

3. Avoid menu touristico

4. Harry's for a drink

5. A gondola ride along the smaller canals

******************************

La Dolce Vita Part 1: Bellagio

La Dolce Vita Part 2: Italian Riviera

La Dolce Vita Honeymoon Part 2: Italian Riviera

2009-10-08T18:20:00.000-07:00

We left off with the hydrofoil ride from Bellagio. We picked up a rental car in Como and headed towards our next destination, Santa Margarita Ligure along the Italian Riviera. Here are some of the highlights. Unfortunately, I broke my camera halfway through...

"Italian Riviera"

Create a free slideshow with Picnik!

To see the captions, run your cursor over the slideshow until you see the drive buttons. Click on 'Captions'.

**********

Previously, La Dolce Vita Honeymoon Part 1: Bellagio

La Dolce Vita Honeymoon Part 1: Bellagio

2009-09-30T08:07:00.000-07:00

Don't hate me. I've been a bad blogger and went on hiatus, adjusting to married and normal life!

I last left you with the overview of the wedding. Before I do a full rewind, I'll warm up and ease my way back into blogging with some snapshots of our foodie honeymoon in northern Italy (Bellagio, Italian Riviera, and Venice).

Here's Part 1: Bellagio. Run your cursor over the show until the drive buttons come up. Click 'caption' to view captions.

"Bellagio"

Create a free slideshow with Picnik!

Macarons and Marie': Part 1, The Highlights

2009-08-05T11:53:00.000-07:00

Mr. P's cousin, Margo, wrote the following message to her family about her trip to rural Virginia for our wedding. I thought it a neat overview of the weekend.

"All weddings are beautiful, but Mr. P and Perfume's was definitely an elegant affair! What I would call a "destination wedding". It started the night before, all the guests were invited to the rehearsal dinner at a beautiful music center tucked into the side of a mountain. We went back to our cute B & B which had been converted from an old mill. They had even converted the old silo into guest rooms. The next day we spent some time with Mr. P's parents, his brother and his brother's wife and several other guests at a Victorian style bed and breakfast with a great big wrap around porch. Then Mom & I headed over to the Homestead resort to walk around a bit before the wedding.

I have been in the Blue Ridge Mountains before but never to Hot Springs or the Homestead -it was like stepping back in time - we just don't have the same age and history in the West. We walked through all the elegant lounges and ball rooms and gardens. The actual ceremony was in the Spa garden, right next to one of the hot springs, lots of marble and sculptured plants. The ring bearer and flower girl were adorable. The wind must have blown the priest's pages back because he started to give the wedding vows twice (so the Perfumes are doubly married :) The reception started out on the big lawn behind the Homestead, and later moved into the Crystal room for a seven course dinner and dancing.
At the entrance to the Crystal room we each had to pick our names from a poster to see which "destination" would be our table. Connie, Danny, Audra, Jared and Mom and I were at the "Stockholm" table (the escort card had a picture of the Perfumes from their visit to Stockholm). Other tables were "Paris" and "Beijing" and many other great locations where they have gone. Many of the guests were from Europe. I am not as good as mingling as Mom is so I only talked to a few people, mainly I enjoyed catching up with the cousins. Perfume's mother was very friendly and came over to talk a few times.

Seemed like maybe 75 or 80 people total, but I'm not good at guessing. Perfume is a great dancer - Mr. P seemed just a bit reluctant! (at one point she was dancing circles around him... but he just stood there and grinned). Instead of sitting at a large table with their wedding party, they had their own little table, just the two of them, I guess it's called a Sweetheart Table - but it made it really easy to approach them.
After the reception Mom and I went back to the hot springs by the Spa Garden and soaked our feet. Heaven! The next morning the Perfumes had a "farewell breakfast" back at the music center before heading off on their honeymoon in Italy (Bellagio, Venice and other dreamy Italian places). Mom and I spent the rest of the day driving through the mountains and along the Blue Ridge Parkway, oohing and aahing at all the rhododendron and mountain laurel (fried green tomatoes for dinner, now that's hard to find back in Wyoming! :)
Love, Margo"
Photos courtesy of guests and Tim and Jamie Jackson.

The Case of The Ugly Cake: Part 2 - A Cake Wreck to Call Our Own

2009-07-26T07:18:00.000-07:00

As I mentioned in my last post, I left the cake in the capable hands of our coordinator. We don't love cake, and it was last on my priority list of details. But...the cake was, obviously, too big a detail to be laissez faire about. I don't know what I was thinking.

Anyway, in the weeks before the wedding, we were focused on macarons, and escort cards, all the final little touches. And the weekend came, and the rehearsal, ceremony, cocktail hour were all wonderful, and we were on a just-married high!

Imagine, if you will, the scene at the dinner hour: We walk in, get introduced as Mr. and Mrs., do our little first dance (more on that later - it was hilarious). We sit down, happy, smiling, taking in the scene of everyone around us...then I look over my shoulder ... [all images are by guests of the wedding unless noted]

Do you see it?

Me: Is that our cake?

Mr. P : It's kind of small...

Me: Hmm, that's not the right color. Huh.

At that point I sort of shrugged it off, just giddy from all the excitement, and it didn't look that bad from far away. Not at all upset. Later on in the evening, I even passed by it, and thought, "That doesn't look right. Maybe it'll look better on camera. Oh well."

I even thought, "I should put the hydrangeas [which were placed around the table] on top of the cake. " But then I forgot about it, had a lot of fun eating, mingling with guests.

Even when it was time to stand in front of it, Mr. P and I giggled, Whoa, that's an uuuuugly cake! We were just so happy in the moment. Various friends and family members made speeches as we stood there smiling, with ugly cake glowing in all its Play-doh-like glory.

Then it was time to cut the cake. We could now see everything up close in HD. We stared at it, muttering under our breaths, "Wowwww. Really? What happened? Did it melt?"

I don't think it melted. I think this is the way it was intended to look. The primitive piping, the haphazard, unfinished, unrefined, roughness of it, made me laugh a little. Just a little. It looked like Play-doh...more like Play-don't, like claymation. It was sort of lumpy, and just...just, just judge for yourselves:

Does our cake wreck look anything like the inspiration below? Play-doh clown cake, I tell you!

Source

C'mon, could the baker have tried to blend the broken, uneven trim together just a little bit better? How about--here's a thought--uniform beads? Look, I'm no baker, and I'm sure decorating with fondant and lacy icing is not easy. But, really? I was better off with no decoration and just fresh flowers. I honestly believe that simple is the way to go. Yeah, simple and butter cream. Fondant=chewing gum.

Anyway, then we tried cutting into it. The fondant had a rubber, texture as we sliced through it. It was difficult to get a slice out, we had to tear a piece off, the icing wouldn't really budge. Then we had a little piece...

It was dry, overly sweet, the icing chewy. Now, to be fair, we only had a little tiny bite. The moment I tasted it, I regretted asking for a switch in the cake flavor. Originally we had lemon cake with raspberry filling. I changed it to almond cake with apricot filling. Grrr. Look at our faces! It's sort of funny! Sort of.

However, we quickly forgot about it, as we had the rest of the night to dance and have fun!!!! I, myself, completely forgot about the cake for weeks.

Why am I even bothering with talking about it now? Well, last week, I suddenly remembered the cake. Sentimental post-bride-brain kicked in. Logic would tell you that you should forget about the cake wreck. But I was just a little curious what happened to the top tier.

So I emailed the coordinator. At that point, it had been a month and a half since the wedding. She responds after a long period of silence, with this email:

"Perfume

Sorry this has taken so long, but I have been out of the office at a conference and then on vacation. I thought that we had moved your cake top to one of our freezers, but I have scoured them all and have not found it. I spoke with our Pastry Chef and he said that when you come for your anniversary he will bake a cake for you.

I hope you had a wonderful honeymoon. Thanks for the beautiful scarf - I will think of you both every time I wear it.

All the best,

Esmé"

I'd like to preface by saying that Esme did a WONDERFUL job as our coordinator; was extremely professional, hard working, detail-oriented, etc. Neither she nor the Homestead has any affiliation with this baker. She just helped us out by finding someone who said s/he could do it. (As the email indicated, we like Esme so much, we got her a little gift from our travels as a thank you.)

However, I didn't like her response. While it was very nice to offer the resort's baker to bake us a random cake on our anniversary, it wouldn't be the cake we had on our wedding day - however hideous, disgusting and ridiculous it was. It may have been a wreck, but it was OUR cake wreck! More to come (we haven't yet resolved the issue)...

How would you feel if a) you got an ugly cake and b) the one-year-anniversary-top-tier got lost--would you just forget about it?

The Case of the Ugly Cake: Part 1 - Sorry, we can't do the cake

2009-07-24T13:11:00.000-07:00

Okay, okay, one (maybe two) more random post before the recaps...

Hello, I'm Mrs. P and I had an ugly wedding cake. Remember when I was trying to decide between the blue cake and croquembouche? Well, I should have gone with the latter.

On our last planning trip back in February, Esme (our coordinator) informed me that the resort's pastry chef could not do the cake in my requested design after all.

The lacey details required a special mould which he did not have.

What it should have looked like. Source

At first, I was not at all disappointed because I had been thinking of the croquembouche in the back of my mind.

I should have gone with this. Source

But then I started to feel dissed. I wanted that cake more than ever now that I couldn't have it. How ridiculous is that? Esme said they could do this cake....

Shoot, at the very least, I should have conceded with this. Source

No, no. I wanted the other cake. Whyyyyyyy??? I'm kicking myself now. We had tasted the lemon and raspberry filled delight and loved it. Why didn't I just bend a little with the design? Stupid, stubborn bride brain.

Then she said another option would be an off-site baker. She said this off-site baker said she could do the cake, and it would actually be a bit cheaper at $10 a slice (rather than the $12 previously quoted). That's not really even a good price. But whatever. Why didn't I have any doubts? Grrr. I guess the risks were obvious. We would not be able to taste the cake given the time constraints and we were so mired in other details that we didn't even bother asking for sample pictures of this baker's work.

I was happy that Esme put in the effort to find someone and trusted it would be fine. Um yeah, no.

Lesson learned (okay, everyone knows this lesson), do a cake audition. Taste it, look at previous cakes done, etc. Oh yeah, and go simple if you're in doubt. Don't let ugly cake happen to you!!! I am so jealous of all the cake ideas I read out there. I see the simple cakes and think, Yeah, I should have done that. Less is more. Speaking of more, you'll see it in Part 2. (Sorry.)

'Tis a Black Lace Capelet

2009-07-23T13:03:00.000-07:00

I've been gone a while - waiting for the pro shots to come in. Promise to post re-caps soon (like you care, but just saying). I'm so uninspired these days. But when I saw these images on one of my favorite blogs, Little Winter Bride (all images by LWB), oh myyyy, I couldn't take my eyes off of this beautiful Italian wedding!

It made me (almost!) want a do-over. Oh the beautiful vintage-y, indie simplicity. I'm so inspired now!

We honeymooned in northern Italy - perhaps that's why I'm so captivated by this bride and her Milanese affair. Makes me yearn for that la dolce vita; that making of sweet, sophisticated things out of simplicity. (Of course the Italians don't have the exclusive rights to this sort of lifestyle - it's just they seem to do it so well!) Check it out:

No veil or long dress - just a lovely wrist corsage, a tea-length swing dress, cool head-piece, and an AMAZING black lace capelet. So beautiful!

I'm really liking the bunches of babies breath. Simple and elegant alone.

Good lawd, I love this black lace capelet. I think I'm going to see if my mom can make one for me. It would look great with any strapless evening/cocktail dress.

Don't you think?

(The 'capelet' is actually a lace shawl the bride tucked it into her gown...I lovesss it.)

Weddings Inspire...

2009-06-23T11:27:00.000-07:00

I have so much to catch up on with recapping. I promise I will. I just wanted to share some great happenings.

In the course of one week of our getting back from our honeymoon, we find out that two couples who were guests at our wedding have some great relationship news:

Cecile & Augustin got engaged:

Is this not the cutest picture? They emailed us from abroad (he's in Tunis and she's in Bhutan...I think?) with a "Guess what?" in the subject line. So sweet! I love it!! How creative is the fern (and his grass) ring?

And Michelle and Graham committed full time to finding a condo after they came back from the wedding...and made an offer on one yesterday! This is a big step in their relationship! She sent along the floorplan. So excited for them!!

Weddings inspire more than design ideas!!! It's a little egotistical to think that ours had something to do with this, but I'd like to think so!

We're Baaack!!!

2009-06-14T15:57:00.000-07:00

We returned from our honeymoon in Italy yesterday. These two and a half weeks have been sheer bliss, and I'm almost sorry to see it all come to an end!!! But I am very happy to be married to my lovey and look forward to many more happy days with him!

The wedding weekend was full of joy and emotion--we had so much fun!!!! I have much to tell, but I'll just let some of the images do the talking for now...

The photos above are sneak-peaks from our photographers, Tim and Jamie Jackson! They were exceptionally great to work with!

The images below are from various guests! I'll post again soon with details of the weekend, including the tea ceremony, welcome dinner, and send-off breakfast!

Today's the Big Day!!!

2009-05-30T04:15:00.000-07:00

We're getting married today!!!! Four years ago when we first met, I never would have guessed that this would ever happen!!! Through the years (has it been years???) of travel, celebration, and breakups, we finally made it!!

I chose this picture because it represents a turning point in our relationship. During that summer two years ago, we reunited one last time after a long hiatus. I sensed something different, more committed, about our relationship. And eight months later, you proposed!!!

So here we are today, Mr P: You and me. The sun is shining and it looks like it's going to be just perfect. Looking out of our window down to our ceremony site, I am so very excited. And despite staying up until 2 am dancing with you, I am up early, wanting to savor every moment of this special day. It is a happy day. And I love you!

Busy Weekend Part II: Macarons!!!!!

2009-05-25T20:47:00.000-07:00

I finished the last batch of the macaron favors right before I left to go for our emergency dance lesson Saturday.
Yes, that's right. I'm making macarons for our wedding favors!!!! Why would a girl who is notorious for not baking decide to bake one of the most difficult pastries in the world for her favors?
Because I love them and I'm obsessed with Laduree. By now everyone knows I love macarons. And no self-identified foodie could get away with NOT making her own something for her wedding, right? Right...if she's crazy. And so it goes...

I attempted the ridiculous and actually succeeded after several tries. There are many different macaron recipes out there, but there are really only two techniques: French and Italian. Many say the Italian method is more reliable, and I suspect it is if you can get the temperature right on the sugar. But I could not, so I found more success with the French method.
Here is the recipe from Martha that I modified a little bit. I have had the most luck with this adaptation of the French method.
French Macarons
2 1/4 cups confectioners’ sugar
1 1/4 cup almond flour
1/2 cup aged** egg whites (KEY STEP: Aging the eggs)
Pinch of salt 1/3 cup granulated sugar
Directions To make the macarons: Preheat the oven to 325 degrees. In a food processor, blend the confectioner's sugar and almond flour.

In the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with the whisk attachment, whip egg whites with salt on medium speed until foamy. Increase speed to high and gradually add granulated sugar.

Continue to whip until stiff glossy peaks form.

With a rubber spatula, gently fold in the confectioners' sugar mixture until completely incorporated. It should be the consistency of lava, and peaks should melt away at this point.
Add six drops of whatever food coloring you want. (I added red drops for light pink and green drops for pistachio green).

Line baking sheets with parchment paper. Trace one-inch circles two inches apart from one another. Be sure to flip the parchment over so you don't bake the pen ink or pencil carbon into the macaron!!!
Fit a pastry bag with a 3/8-inch #4 round tip, and fill with batter. Pipe 1-inch disks onto prepared baking sheets, leaving 2 inches between cookies. The batter will spread a little.

Tap the sheet against the counter to get the air bubbles out. One or two taps will do.
THIS IS KEY: Let stand at room temperature until dry, and a soft skin forms on the tops of the macarons and the shiny surface turns dull, about 30 minutes.

Bake, with the door of the oven slightly ajar (I put a wooden spoon between the door and the oven to keep it the tiniest bit open--THIS IS ANOTHER KEY STEP). Bake for about 12 minutes.

The macarons should have "feet" those little bubbly-edged things at the bottom. Remove baking sheet to a wire rack and let the macarons cool completely on the baking sheet. Gently peel off the parchment. Their tops are easily crushed, so take care when removing the macaroons from the parchment. Use immediately or store in an airtight container, refrigerated for up to 2 days or frozen for up to 1 month.
I made mine in several different batches in the past couple of months and froze them.

I'm filling the macarons with ginger jam for the green and grapefruit marmelade for the pink (I looove grapefruit, and we're also serving grapefruit-flavored Italian soda as our little signature refresher at the cocktail hour). But if you want to make your own filling, the recipe is below.
Macaron Filling
To fill the macarons: Fill a pastry bag with the filling. Turn macarons so their flat bottoms face up. On half of them, pipe about 1 teaspoon filling. Sandwich these with the remaining macarons, flat-side down, pressing slightly to spread the filling to the edges. Refrigerate until firm, about 1 hour.
I haven't filled them yet. I'm packing them frozen for the trip down to our venue and then will do them the night before and put them in these (remember these?) tiny Chinese take-out containers that I made labels for.

Good luck!!!! It's not at all hard once you get the hang of it!!!
Next up...last minute bachelorette party!!!!

**Aging helps concentrate the egg whites. You put them in a bowl and set them out for 24-36 hours. Be sure to use pasteurized eggs!

Busy Weekend Part 1: Emergency Dance Lesson!

2009-05-25T17:29:00.000-07:00

What a ridiculously hectic weekend!!!! I baked the last batch of macarons, my sister flew in for my (last minute) bachelorette party, and we organized and assembled all the paper goods and items to take down to our venue. Oh yeah, we also squeezed in a dance lesson!

So after reading Miss Yorkie's post on her dance lessons, I panicked and realized that I had forgotten to schedule lessons. Well, at this stage in the game that means one (singular) lesson. Ha!!

I pick up choreography and dance very quickly, because, well, I spent the better part of my life in ballet and jazz classes. The problem is, when Mr. P and I dance together, I usually lead...for example, I dip myself:

This is not a good thing for your wedding dance, as you may confuse your partner. We needed a lesson to teach Mr. P to lead and definitely a lesson for me to learn to follow. So on Thursday, I found a couple on Craigslist to teach us. However sketchy that may sound, they were the only ones who could get us in last minute.

Turns out they were a nice retired couple, who teach ballroom dance at a local community dance center. They also give private lessons in their basement in McLean, Va. Bonnie and Art are the cutest, most patient and thoughtful teachers! We did a quick hour and a half fox-trot lesson to our song (it's not really "our song", it's more the theme song of the wedding), Nina Simone's "My Baby Just Cares for Me" (the soft version).

Their dog, Red, wasn't really impressed (by our skillz).

We looked a little (read: a lot) awkward together, and it made me giggle. The lesson was definitely geared towards the male partner, as he will be doing all the leading (and all the work). I was so proud of Mr. P, he picked up a lot, really a lot, in the 90 minutes.

So I feel okay about it because Art and Bonnie said that as long as I follow Mr. P closely, but help him smooth it out, then we'll be fine. If anything, it'll be amusing!!! Here's a couple who does it right:

Next up, the macarons!!!

Big Arse Hair Flower

2009-05-22T11:30:00.000-07:00

I'm jumping on the hair flower train. Sure, the oh-so-popular trend will date my pics. (Oh well!) I like the trend. But, I like giant flowers. It was confirmed after I saw this on Oncewed.com. It's highly stylized, only good for editorials and, of course, totally impractical. Perfect!!

Source

So, as you may know, I'm not a crafty person. At all. But I'll try just about anything. Most of the time it's failure. With a capital F. But I'm never discouraged. So....last night I tried making a giant flower corsage (for my rehearsal dinner dress) as practice for a giant flower fascinator. Let's just say, it wasn't failure. It took me all of 15 minutes, so....

I went ahead and made the hair flower fascinator! (It's basically the flower attached to a comb.)

Here's what it looks like on! Talk about giant...and impractical! Therefore, it must be worn! (At the reception.)

Are you, err, doing anything trend-ee?

Table "Numbers"

2009-05-21T12:52:00.000-07:00

Instead of table numbers, we're doing table "places". They're the cities to which Mr. P and I have travelled together. Our wedding website's gallery (shamelessly goes to cheesetown and) documents all the major excursions of the four years of our relationship.

So I thought why not continue the theme of travel (sans our grinning mugs, which I'm sure our friends and families are sick of by now!)?

I worked with Lindsey Ryan (once again!) to come up with VINTAGE (yes, more vintage) images and postcards of each city. Here they are:

For Saigon, I have an antique set of Indochinese postcards that I have framed, and thought maybe we could scan a copy of one of them to use. But I found this nice image online and sent it to Lindsey to embellish...

We also did one for our hometown:

And....one for our "speshul" place, Hot Springs--our weekend getaway and now our wedding destination--will be displayed at our sweetheart table:

Are you doing something different with your table numbers? Are they actually numbers?

The Home Stretch

2009-05-20T08:58:00.000-07:00

I was up late last night pasting on the labels for the favors and emailing back and forth with Lindsey on the menu and program designs. Mr. P has been doing a lot of coordinating and is really on the ball with managing Esme and logistics (even while he's in Seattle). Things are really coming together! Hopefully by Saturday we'll be done with everything and relax!! My goal is to have nothing to do next week!!!

Dress For Mom

2009-05-19T14:45:00.000-07:00

As I've mentioned, my mother has put in countless hours sewing all sorts of things, major things (veil, BM dresses, Asian tea ceremony outfits, ring pillows, etc.), for our wedding. The latest project was my reception dress, which I told her to make ONLY if she had the time. Of course, she barely pieced together her own dress before finishing mine.

Unfortunately, she didn't like the dress that she made. I had sketched out something that I thought she'd look good in, but it didn't translate very well. Good thing it's not totally finished. I called her today and told her not touch it. I bought a dress for her.

Here it is!!! She loves blue and Champagne, and I think the jacket has a slightly Asian feel with the brocade, trapunto stitching and high collar. I hope she likes it.

Source

Packaging the Favors

2009-05-19T13:07:00.000-07:00

Okay, you all already know about my obsession with Laduree packaging.

Source

And you probably also know about my penchant for cultural nods...

So I tried to bring these two ideas together vis a vis the favor boxes (for the macarons I made--more on those later).

For the frenchy-flare, I created the labels (at the top) in MS Publisher and pasted them on to these (obviously Asian) small (2-3/4" x 2" x 2-1/2") green take-out boxes that I ordered from Nashville Wraps.

And voila!

Reception/Getaway Dress: Which Shoe?

2009-05-19T11:59:00.001-07:00

A while back when I got the pattern for the BM dresses, I picked up a retro fifties-looking swing dress pattern just for kicks. I thought I'd have my mom make it for either my rehearsal dress or maybe a dress for the reception.

I decided that I probably wouldn't be able to really kick up my heels (who says that anymore? I just did) wearing my slim, sheath wedding gown. So I asked my mom to sew the dress for me to wear sometime during the reception (maybe a sort of getaway dress). I picked it up this past weekend! She did an amazing job on it! I was so pleased! (I'm going to encourage her to open an Etsy shop for veils and BM dresses or something.)

But, my poor mom, she's worked so hard making all sorts of things for our wedding--I need to do something nice for her. She hadn't finished her own dress, and I'm not sure she's really happy with it, so I think I'll buy her something...

Anyhoo, I really love the collar detail on this dress!

The question is shoes. Which looks best? The patterned peeptoe, pointy beige or poofy aqua slingback?

*UPDATE*: many of you have asked about this dress. We just opened our Etsy shop and this dress is the first listing! Check it out here.

So I Almost Forgot...THE SEATING CHART!

2009-05-17T19:28:00.000-07:00

I've been skipping along, not at all stressed. Whenever anyone asked, the answer was, "I'm still waiting to feel overwhelmed or anxious." Well, it finally punched me in the face. Stress. Yesterday, as I was going through my list and Mr. P was playing golf, I realized we hadn't done anything with the seating chart. I always knew, and ALWAYS said that I'd probably forget something critical. So there I was. Prophecy fulfilled.

Thankfully, as Bees, we get a complimentary trial of this wonderful software called PerfectTablePlan. So I dug around in my email to find the license key for it. I gotta tell you, it was a life saver, and really, really easy to use. It sort of reminds me of Visio.

You upload (we have everything in a spreadsheet) or enter in your guests' names by hand. You can do it in singles, couples or groups.

Then you specify the type of table and table arrangement. Square, round, number of chairs, etc.

Then you drag and drop in your guests' names. It's that easy. You can move the tables and guests around, no more post-it notes and confusion. I really like it because it's clear, clean and visual. Everytime you move someone in a seat, they get "marked off" or unhighlighted. If you replace someone and that someone is missing a seat, they get sent back to the guest list highlighted.

It's a really great way to keep track of who've you seated and where they're seated. It's also great because you can rename each table. We're doing cities that we've traveled to, and it really helps us create a fun theme. For example, Mr. P lived in China for a number of years, and his old China hand buddies coming to the wedding will be sitting at, what else, the Beijing table!!! It took me about 45 minutes to figure everything and then print to pdf. Then we sent it to the rents for a final vetting. And done! It was a snap and so easy and intuitive, I went ahead and did a chart in about 20 minutes for the rehearsal dinner as well.

This thing is a life saver. It's very inexpensive at $30 and I highly recommend it! No one paid me to say it!!

Rehearsal Dinner Invitations

2009-05-15T08:13:00.000-07:00

My FMIL sent out the rehearsal dinner invitations the other week. It's more of a welcome dinner than a rehearsal dinner, as everyone coming to the wedding is invited to the party the night before.

The rsvp deadline is today. So far about 50 (out of 80) people will be coming.

Our invitation designer, Lindsey Ryan, created these for my FMIL. They look similar to but are not exactly the same as our invites. I asked that none of the specific elements from our suite be used, as I was worried guests might be confused.

Still, they turned out very close (and there was at least one party that got confused). Oh well. I do like the way they turned out, though!

Last Minute Petals

2009-05-14T11:34:00.000-07:00

Pink ribbons, vintage roses, a long veil...I never knew I was that girl!! I've talked about her before here. It's just uncanny how wedding planning turns a person into TG. So, I own it; I'm in love with all that flowery, pink, and sparkly stuff. I surprised myself. I know, it was obvious to everyone but me.

Aaaaanyway, after I saw this image (like so many other Bees) on Martha last week, I decided that I need the petal toss. I never planned on the toss, so this last minute addition really was a surprise.

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I didn't consider it before because, well, it didn't appeal to me. Plus, the way the chairs are arranged around the boxwoods in the garden where our ceremony will take place, it would be difficult to get a good aim!

But I thought about it, and it makes sense that the petal toss happen after the portraits are taken, as we come up the hill from the garden to the lawn where we will have the cocktail reception. Logistically, it's perfect. We would stay behind in the garden to take pictures as the guests get drinks. And after they've loosened up a bit with some bevies, they'll be handed a cone filled with these:

Pale cream and white freeze-dried rose petals. I got 66 cups for about $60 (and had a 15% off coupon that I found online). There are a few neat things about freeze dried flowers:

1. They're amazingly supple

2. They won't wilt, stain, or become slippery

3. They keep for months (even years)

4. They smell nice!

5. They're less expensive than fresh petals

6. They're biodegradable

I got them from Flyboy Naturals and they arrived last night (lovingly packaged, I must say)!!! Now I need to make the cones or something to put them in.

Did you surprise yourself with decisions about your wedding too?

Welcome (to the Country) Bags!

2009-05-14T09:16:00.000-07:00

Early in our planning, I stumbled across this favor bag idea on Oncewed.com. I love the old-timey, countrified simplicity of these!!!

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So I decided to co-op the idea for our welcome bags.

I used the same laurel wreath and 'S' stamps that we had used on the invitation boxes, except this time with brown rather than gold ink. And to close the bag, I folded the tops over, hole-punched two holes through the folds and pulled a ribbon through them, securing with a bow.

I made these three-panel fold welcome pamphlets, which include a little message, an itinerary of the weekend's events, and a map on the back. I really must thank Miss Ballet Flat for the fantastic map tutorial and Miss Deviled Egg for her idea to use water color paper (I actually used drawing paper) to add heft and texture without blowing the budget.

The only issue with making these was the formatting for the printer. Since the paper was an unusual 8x10 size, I had to hand feed each sheet, and waited for the printer to re-calibrate each time. Very time consuming--I spent a good two hours just on printing (about double that on designing and formatting the images). It might have just been a problem with the equipment I was using, but I note it for posterity. (Oh yeah, and punching rounded corners was fun times, too.)

We added a Bath County visitor's guide (which highlights beautiful back roads), a county driving tour guide...

...some local and not-so-local food favorites:

Hubbard's Virginia peanuts. The snack packs are called "Hubbies"!! How funny is that?

Little bottles of Pellegrino (a bit of a nod to our honeymoon destination)...

Nonni's dark chocolate biscotti (another nod). They're individually wrapped--very convenient...

And of course, a little packet of hangover helper, Excedrin!

Welcome to the country!

Rose Update

2009-05-13T21:17:00.000-07:00

So after a wonderful reader educated me about the Amnesia rose, I emailed the name to my florist, who hadn't a clue.

She spoke with her wholesaler who said they looked really awful, almost grayish purple in person. So I went back to searching, having armed myself with a few key terms like, "vintage rose" and "bicolor". I sent her the names of three different varieties:

1. La Belle Bicolor Novelty Rose

2. Peppermint Bicolor Cream with Pink Rose

3. New Geraldine

She said they can source the La Belle. I think they're a bit better since they're more pink than purple (I don't have anything purple in my color scheme--oy, color scheme?). Anyhoo, my fingers are crossed that they are not too pink or plain/uninteresting/ugly!!! At this point, I don't really care...although I wonder if I should just go back to the calla lilies. No, Miss P. Shut down your browser and go to bed. (I'm talking to myself--a bad sign.)

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Oh, and by the way, I also learned from my online education that the cut stage of the flower is important. The more open the flower, the more expensive it tiz. Since I want a larger head on the flower, that means it's "premium". Yes, and we know what that means: up charging. Oy.

Thank You Cards: Like Sandra Lee, Semi-Homemade

2009-05-13T10:11:00.000-07:00

As you may know, we did not register for anything. Well, actually, we buried a pseudo registry (Honeyfund.com) in our wedding website, but didn't think anyone would navigate to it. However, people are more tenacious than we thought! So we had some thank you cards to write (especially after the non-shower dinner the other night)!!

Initially I was going to order up some thank you notes from Lindsey (our invitation designer extraordinaire) to match our invitations. But we never got around to it. A little while back, Mr. P came up with the idea of using something that is reflective and specific of our venue (since it's kind of like a third character in our wedding play!).

So on our last planning trip to the Homestead, we asked Esme (our coordinator) for some notecards with the resort's image. She gladly gave us a bunch of these beautiful pen and ink printed cards. They're simple, a little vintage-y and perfect! I just needed to spruce them up a little bit. I lined the envelopes (they're really thin);

created a 'thank you' band;

and made a wrap around label (I love the look of the wrap arounds, and I tried to imitate the style of an old apothecary label).

And voila! Semi-homemade, customized, and FREE! Now if only I had some seasoning packets and some gin...

Happy Engage-a-versary, Mr. P

2009-05-12T22:09:00.000-07:00

Dear Lovey-Magilacutty,

Exactly one year ago, you truly surprised me with your thoughtful and well-planned proposal. I'm sorry we can't be together to honor the occasion today, but we'll be celebrating an even bigger event very soon! Miss you and stay warm in Seattle!!

Happy engage-a-versary!

Love,

P.S. And spanks for the hilarious e-card!!

Help--Does Anyone Know the Name of this Rose?

2009-05-11T15:07:00.000-07:00

Is it Cool Water? Or Smooth Moonlight? Or something else??? ****UPDATE: I love the blogosphere. A reader just informed me that it might be Amnesia. AND it most certainly is!!! Now if only the florist can get them!!!

A Non-Shower Dinner Party: Practice for the Big Day

2009-05-10T21:51:00.001-07:00

Our great friends, Travis and Suzi, hosted a (non)shower dinner for us at their rustic country restaurant, the Heart in Hand, Friday night. It was so lovely!!! There were about 30 people and the fun part was that it was kind of like a neat run-up to the wedding. I gotta say, even with only 30 people, it was hard to get around to saying hello to everyone (given it was only two hours or so). To encourage mingling, Suzi scared up some name tags for all the guests...even US! Suzi did all the flower arrangements herself. There was a little cocktail hour before (I was late, as getting out of DC was a nightmare, as it always is on Friday nights). Then there was dinner, which was off their group catering menu. Almost all the food is some sort of recipe from Suzi's family, including some amazing yeast rolls (that tasted like corn bread), citrus poppy vinaigrette, country filet and salmon, home-made pastries...It was all very down-home and simple. There were speeches: Suzi recalling a fond memory of Mr. P as a child and when she and Travis first met me. Mr. P thanked our lovely hosts and wonderful guests, and kidded about the great distances many came (from the city or, in his case, fresh off a plane from Seattle where he was on business). The lovely little restaurant, located in the historic town of Clifton, Virginia, is decorated in early American style (as Suzi collects antiques). It also houses several mementos from the couple's polo life (including this picture of them after a match they played against Prince Charles--who are these people?!). It was a non-shower party because we didn't really register for any gifts. But some guests brought us things that they knew we'd like and collect anyway! Antique sterling wine coaster (Mr. P has a bunch of vintage and antique silver wine accessories). Hand-painted Chinese Porcelain (we have a lot of Chinese porcelain)...this bowl is exceptionally delicate and thin. Gastronomic foodie gifts from Spain, via Michelle. And Venice Biennale art festival tickets for our Italian honeymoon! (After we insisted on no gifts, our mothers said that people will want an option of giving SOMETHING, so we have a Honeyfund.com account.) It was so sweet, fun, and we are so incredibly grateful for our family and friends!! Now we're a little more prepared to engage each of our guests.

Happy Mother's Day!

2009-05-10T16:10:00.000-07:00

My mother, Mr. P and I went to FMIL's for Mother's Day. There, we celebrated with a nice lunch of ham and Champagne and toasted to our wonderful mothers and Mr. P's SIL (who is the mother of our flower girl and ring bearer).

It felt so warm and happy, and it was a lovely day for it. The sun was shining as we ate out on the deck and laughed and chatted. My mother and FILs have met on several occasions, but these past few have brought them so much closer together. Everyone gets along, and I'm grateful for that.

And while I already feel like part of the family, it was a little more validated when FSIL explained to the ring bearer and flower girl that "Miss P" will be "Auntie P" in a few weeks!!

1960s Vintage: The Rehearsal Dress

2009-05-08T11:44:00.001-07:00

Did I ever mention my rehearsal dress? The vintage one? No, not the getaway dress, but the one for the rehearsal and welcome dinner...

From top: 1, 2, 3, 4

I love the crisp, lady-like style of the 50's and 60's cocktail dress. Oscar de la Renta has done a great job of creating lovely clean, classic lines (as demonstrated above) throughout his career. And he continues that today in his contemporary interpretation:

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However, his designs are obviously out of my budget. So I thought, why not vintage couture? Great quality and craftsmanship, authentically 1960s, and best of all: ONE OF A KIND!

I found this cream-colored brocade beauty at Hat Feathers Vintage for an absolute steal! Check it out! It was started by Jenn, a vintage-obsessed collector!

She's Going to Kill Me Over the Dusty Roses

2009-05-07T09:26:00.000-07:00

So I had my first serious nightmare last night. Among other things, it was about flowers. I dreamt that the tiny start-up florist that we went with used purple mums and some rope for my bouquet. Oh yeah, and a single wilted rose. There were some flowers in some pails in the the getting-ready-room (which by the way, was the green room of a theater) and I tried to put them together, but they kept calling my cue. Wedding, theater, it's all the same.

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I realized this morning that I want different flowers. That what I spied while reading OnceWed blog yesterday afternoon worked its way into my subconscious and surreptitiously took over my flower plan. I no longer love the mini Calla lilies that I already specified to the florist. Now I would like (really like) these:

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I was anti-roses (especially white) for my bouquet. It was peonies, then Calla lilies, but now, it's dusty roses! They're soooo old fashioned!!! I love them! So I just emailed the florist. She's going to kill me. And then tell me it's too late. :(

An Unexpected Gift That's Just Right

2009-05-06T08:45:00.000-07:00

When I visited my mom on Sunday, she gave me a gift that one of her friends had left for me. It was some lingerie. And it came just in time. (BTW, I didn't know Victoria's Secret sells Betsy Johnson.)

I had on my mental checklist to purchase a little something for our wedding night, but it was waaaay low on the priority list.

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So, now I don't have to worry about it! It's white, bridal-y, simple, and fits! I love when unexpected things work out just right!

Saying No to Prom Wedding

2009-05-05T17:03:00.000-07:00

[PENGY: Please don't publish in WB]

I got this hilarious message from my friend, Alissa, today. She was to be married next week, but, as you'll read, she had to stop the prom wedding train. PROM WEDDING!

It reminded me of why we were so adament about having only 80 people. We want to serve good food and wine in a somewhat intimate setting where we can talk with guests. We received the last of our rsvp's today, and thankfully, it's right at our estimate. We almost had the issue of crashing and burning into a giant prom wedding when Mr. P's dad tried to invite all the cousins. Thankfully, that train was stopped and we won't have to serve banquet hall clucken and salmon.

We're not alone in wanting this. Alissa, puts it more bluntly!

"Congrats!!! I know the big day is coming soon. I know you will look fabulous--as always, but I hope you stop to take a breath and have a wonderful time. I'm sure, with you at the helm, everything will be GOOOOORGEOUS.

We actually pushed the wedding back to June 6, because, well, we changed everything in February because it was becoming a beast/monster called "The Worst". Too many people. Not what we wanted--and slowly careening into prom wedding. And I hated every minute of planning. So we cut the guest list down to the nearest and dearest of 30 heads and changed the setting from my 'rents country club in Long Island to a little Inn in Staunton, VA. More dinner party than anything else. Less stress, less fuss, more us. And more fun with the details. All local food, wine, flowers, etc. So, I went from hating the wedding to loving it. Thankfully. But either way--I'm glad there is a goddamn honeymoon en route. Where are you going?!

xoxoxoxoxo,

Your fellow bride in waiting"

Hers will definitely be a stylish, intimate affair...

Monday Thought: A Slinky Dress

2009-05-04T12:53:00.000-07:00

As our wedding day gets closer, the ideas and themes have tightened. Many things have changed, others have crystallized. But one thing has remained constant: my love of the slinky vintage wedding dress.

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SWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON with a spoon.

Let's Try This Again

2009-05-01T12:04:00.000-07:00

It's May!! We get married this month. I can't believe how time flies. So we're moving along, whittling down the to-do list. One major thing was to get our marriage license (again). Mr. P leaves for a business trip next week, and we won't have any time from now until the wedding, so we had to get it today! Recall, we got a license before; this would be our second trip to the courthouse. We didn't know (how could we not? Idiots!) that the license we got a while back was only good for sixty days. We were 67 days out. Grrrr.

We got the same clerk lady. She's really lame. I mean REALLY lame. This go 'round, she actually asked us (as she sucked the lunch out of her teeth) if we're going to be married within sixty days. Yes, thanks for asking this time, Ms. Customer Service '09.

We were in a hurry, as it was our lunch hour. The courthouse does not allow cameras. So I left mine in the car to be used outside after we finished (because I'm obsessed with documenting everything in this process--it's sick, I know). To expedite things, Mr. P (enabler) went out to get it, so we could hurry things along. Well, Ms. Customer Service waited until he left to tell us that there was one more thing that we had to sign. Seriously, she took her time and purposefully waited until he got into the elevator to say something.

Hey Arlington County courthouse, office of the marriage license authority: Your front desk clerk STINKS (and I do not mean in the olfactory sense). And she's slow. And not friendly. And clearly hates her job. But lucky for you guys, losers like us like to pay you twice, and Ms. CS ensures that for you!!

Anyhoo, we got our license. Here we are! Marginally redeemed from our previous flub. But the fact that we're both wearing pink cancels that out.

A Foodie Fest Shower: Suprisingly Nice and Humbling

2009-04-27T08:50:00.001-07:00

I should be ashamed of myself. I had low expectations for my bridal shower. As you may know, there was a little bit of tension in the planning of it. I had felt that my BMs weren't into it, and I was over it. So this weekend when I arrived at my mom's house with my friend Michelle (to whom I protested), I was VERY surprised and seriously humbled by the huge effort everyone made on my behalf.

My mother, BM Abby, and my sister pulled together a wonderful and thoughtful event that came together beautifully. My mom cooked up a storm of Vietnamese lunch goodies. Abby made the cutest guest gifts of spatulas and cookie cutters.

And my sister coordinated the whole thing--despite being a busy lawyer commuting between Tel Aviv and New York. I chalked her harried/hapazard planning to not caring. (But seriously, if I had her schedule, a bridal shower would be the last thing on my priority list, for sure. Very perspective-giving.)

Saturday was the warmest day in Washington so far this year; it finally felt like Spring. And it certainly looked it at my mom's house. Everything was blooming, including the tulips she potted for the occasion and the ton of bouquets displayed.

Though there was not a lot of planning (my sister arrived in town the night before on Friday), the details did not betray this. My sister got everything together last minute, and used the leftover ribbon from the ring pillow to tie together the utensils. The table looked beautiful with sparkly glasses, Champagne, china, cutesy napkins. And of course Abby's colorful bouquet of guest gift spatulas added to the fun.

I asked that Vietnamese food be served for the lunch part. Because none of the (pretty international contingent of) guests was Vietnamese, I thought it would be nice to have them taste a little bit of "the homeland"! So my mom obliged with green papaya and shrimp salad, tofu and noodles, spring rolls, and shrimp chips (no those aren't pork rinds!). The most popular item (that I forgot to picture) were the summer rolls--a salad of greens, herbs and shrimp rolled in thin rice paper.

It was such a good time opening up gifts and tasting the food! We didn't do any of the usual shower games, as we apparently didn't need them! The afternoon was chock full of lively conversation that ranged from the wedding, to our significant others, children, then inevitably to travel and ethnic culture. It's funny, food has a way of bringing people together (who doesn't love food?), making them distinct (plenty of culturally diverse food gifts), as well as highlighting commonalities (my mom's yucca cakes that she made for dessert was apparently also something that Brazilian lovely, Desi, makes as well).

Everyone was sooooo creative with the gifts they brought. Since Mr. P and I did not register for any gifts, my sister specified in the invitation that people come up with something interesting and food related for "the foodie".

Garlic and garlic baker; fun condiments including Filipino banana catsup, truffle oil, pear vinegar and more; neat spices including Britannian fleur de sel and herbs de provence rub, Bhutanese lemongrass tea; Spanish smoked paprika, Russian spices, herbs Pariesian; fancy shimmering and rose petal sugars; ethnic pantry items: french oyster hot toast spread and English curry beans; fantastic jams and sweetners: Malawian honey, Brittanian caramel; pineapple chutney, sour cherry jam; a sh*tload of salt: lavender, Himalayan, fleur de sel, English sea, and French grey.

There was definitely a salt theme! I love salt! I now have a serious array of the seasoning that spans from French grey, to fleur de sel, to English sea salt, to two varieties of Himalayan pink salt.

One is the large variety rocks that comes with its own grater! I love it!

There was a ton of interesting spices to represent some of the nationalities present.

One gift of spice was particularly neat and appropos! Abby gave this lovely box of various seasonings, along with this very special spice tin. Around the world throughout history, food and spices have been given as wedding charms. In a Chinese chard box (which, unbeknownst to Abby we collect!), there were various charms including Rosemary for rememberance (a la Shakespeare); nutmeg (the German and English give this) for a sound marriage; star anise (given in China to represent all centeredness (or something like that). There were some peppercorns in there too--I'm guessing to keep things hot!

My sister gave a wonderful box of cheese from Artisanal fromagery and bistro in Manhatten. She with the help of the chef hand picked the three different cheeses, along with tomato jam for the gift box. Mr. P and I looooove cheese, especially the stinky ones!!! And this box was ripe!!!

There were other thoughtful touches, including a large goody bag from the lovely English belle, Fay! She included things from her homeland like curry beans, a pineapple chutney (that she made), the garlic and garlic baker above (we love spreading roasted garlic on bread!) and something to prep us for our Italian honeymoon: A magazine of Italian gastronomic adventures--the Cucina Italiana!

We joked about all the ethnic stereotypes including being late. We were expecting one more: Miss Cecile, who is French. The French are always fabulously late!

And she blows in an hour and a half later with fabulous gifts, including caramel (which of course contains lovely salt) from her grandmother's hometown of Brittany, a vintage Champagne, and many other things from her travels, including Bhutanese lemon grass tea and an every day favorite of oyster toast spread!

Ever the jokester, my long lost (and recently reacquainted) friend, Eileen, who had been emailing me about her diet trials, gave this bottle of lemon detox (for all the bloat that is inevitable of a high salt diet and any potentially crazy bridal weight loss frenzy)!!!

And as if all the talk and giving of food wasn't enough, we had dessert of cupcakes, tropical fruit, yucca cakes, and Jasmine green tea. It was a little east meets west; the Vietnamese usually have fruit and tea after a meal, and what modern American bride is without cupcakes!!! My sister picked up these red velvet and cream cheese frosted lovelies from Suzannes, one of the new local cupcakeries in the area!!

And after everyone left, my mother, sister and I relaxed on the couch as they opened the hostess gifts I brought: wine glasses for my sister and pinking sheers for my mother (Abby got Chinese coasters that I sent in the mail).

Later that evening, Mr. P showed up to get the debrief, some leftovers, and help me pack the car with all the goodies!

It was a fabulous time with so much genuine love and kindness, that I have a renewed sense of gratefulness for my friends and family.

Final Planning Trip Part I: Makeup and Hair Trial

2009-04-20T09:07:00.000-07:00

We went to the Homestead this weekend for our final planning trip before the wedding! This time, we brought our officiant...just because (more on that later). Ostensibly, we were there to go over some final details of the timeline, menu choices and logistics with our coordinator (ugh, there was a problem with the cake...again, more on that later). And we met our new, local, start-up florist (hmm, more on that, too)!!! I also had a makeup and hair trial. Here were my inspirations:

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Eva Longoria's loosely pinned up hair with some wispy pieces.

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Here, Rachel Weisz wears it as a faux bob. Perfect for a vintage-y wedding. However, there's a fine line between wispy and prom ringlets, so I wasn't sure if the hairdresser could pull it off. I also had the vague notion of having it pinned to the side so I can let it down in to a side pony tail for the reception. Like this:

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So here's how it went down....

(Top left) Everyday face and undone hair; (top right): The hairdresser curled my hair with a 1 inch curling iron, spiraling around the iron to create the loose waves, teased the top a little, then pinned it to the side very loosely (bottom left); she also did my makeup and made me look really tan (why?) and put on a frosty pink lipstick (I was surprised to like it); I also took down the pins to see what the side pony would look like (bottom right).

Overall she did an okay job--but not $280 worth of okay. I don't want to have to pay that again if I can do it myself. So I'm strongly considering DIY-ing (at least the make-up; the hair, with some adjustments will work--what do you think?).

I like the idea of the rosy cheek and frosty pink lips a la Miss Portman's goddess look:

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So I tried it out this morning before work. I definitely think I need to go darker on the eyes, but I didn't want to scare anyone in the office:

What do you think? Should I DIY my own makeup or just leave it to the pro? I'm going to do a DIY hair trial too (keep you posted).

Flower Girl Dress

2009-04-15T20:05:00.000-07:00

Way back in December, when I was going for my first round of dress hemming, I found a flower girl dress at the bridal shop that was handling my alterations.

The owner of the shop was trying to get rid of her inventory and had a lot of cute flower girl dresses on sale. She made each one herself. Since our flower girl was not with us, she let us take one of the dresses to try on our little elf, and bring it back at our leisure (nice, huh?).

My niece-to-be (i.e. Mr. P's brother's daughter) was barely four at the time. The dress was huge on her. It touched the floor and the arm holes were gigantic. Also, the shoulders were way too wide.

Despite all this, we weren't worried because five months is a lifetime for a four year old in terms of growth. We figured that we'd go ahead and get the dress a little big and my mother (once again) could do the adjustments. I really love the little flower appliques in cream and the ivory organza of the dress. I didn't want to give it up!

So after a few months of waiting (on our part) and growing (on future niece's part), we brought it with us this weekend when we visited for Easter brunch. My mother, along with Mr. P's parents, were there, so it was great to get a little fashion show and alteration pinning done!!!

The length is now perfect and the only thing that needs to be done is a little taking in at the chest.

Ta da!!! This is how princesses work it....

What shoes would you pair with this ensemble? Tights or bobby socks?

Why I Love Weddingbee: The Thought Does Count

2009-04-15T14:15:00.000-07:00

Warning: Gushing ahead!!

I love Weddingbee because everyone is just so nice. I get great advice and suggestions about everything from Fray Check for my ring pillow, to figuring out a better florist situation, to ideas on invitation designers (you readers are the reason for my invitations)!

And every so often, I'll get a PM or a comment from a reader who thought of me for some reason. Like, reader, mrspaetz sent me a link (on my post on photography no less) to a great pair shoes, citing how the pale blue and deco design made her think of me. So. Nice!

Or when I got a message from local bee reader, GwenMarieDC, about the shooting at the Homestead, sending her thoughts and wishes...It's just really touching that people care and remember, you know? I can't tell you how great it is to hear readers' enthusiastic compliments, your wonderful ideas, and inspirations.

Additionally, there is the same warmth and support from the WB bloggers. As you may or may not know, a lot of us bloggers don't really know each other in "real life". But the forum seems to cultivate a neat sort of cyber friendship.

One of those friendships is mine with Miss Quiche. We have a lot in common (namely Paris--the city), and have naturally gravitated towards each others' posts. Non-sexual crush you say? Perhaps. We've exchanged a couple emails but we've actually never met!

So, it was soooooooo lovely to get this surprise package in the mail from the lovely Chicago bloggerette:

On her trip to Paris, she thought of me and my crazy obsession with Laduree and macarons. So she picked up these wonderful dragees. I WAS SO TOUCHED to get these in the mail! A cute little box on the outside read "Just wanted to say, Bounjour!" and it came with a sweet little message, and of course the BEAUTIFUL dragees and Laduree box! (I'm keeping the box forever. The dragees are already gone!)

She even "stuffed" the box with print-outs of macarons (she tried to get the macarons, but they have a short shelf life--bad for the plane ride). Just so incredibly sweet! THANK YOU, Mmlle. QUICHEY!!!

Again, it's the thought, good-will, kindness, and friendliness that makes Weddingbee so special in the sometimes (catty) cold wedding blogosphere.

White is Right (?)

2009-04-13T08:28:00.000-07:00

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I went in for my my semi-annual dental cleaning yesterday morning. As an after-thought, I asked the dentist about teeth whitening, and the next thing I knew they were taking a plaster mould of my mouth. He said I was a good candidate as I have healthy teeth and gums and my teeth could use some brightening. (see how yellow my teeth are on the chart thing? I marked it myself.)

The dentist said that, given the time frame, I should be okay to bleach for the next month or so, but need to start right away. He doesn't advocate the in-office, one-hour procedure, as it causes extreme sensitivity, is expensive, and the results aren't that good. So I believed him. And when he said the in-office procedure was expensive, I thought the implication was that the gradual, fitted-mouth tray approach would be more reasonable in comparison. So when I checked out, I was surprised to be charged $400 (separate from the cleaning)!!!

Apparently, the big initial investment is the custom-moulded tray. The bleach solution is not very expensive, but the key is to have a snug fit with the tray. He says the over the counter-brands are okay, but they won't give the whitening effect that I want because of the loose delivery mechanism (rubber hot-water-moulded strips or film strips).

They were very quick about creating the trays, and I picked them up that afternoon. The doc instructed me on how to apply the solution and used an initial (strong) 45% solution that I wore for about 30 minutes (the one I would use would be 20% and I'd wear it overnight). I must say the custom trays are amazing! I've done over the counter bleaching before and my gums always got irritated because the trays were never snug enough (so I never followed through with it). These moulded trays are incredible; they feel snug and no bleach leaks to the back of my throat or up towards my gums. My teeth were a little sensitive afterwards, though.

Last night I followed the directions and put some solution in the tray, being careful not to put too much of it along the bottom part of the tray, as excess amounts would be too harsh for my teeth and burn my gums (and waste the product, oh no!). I wore them overnight without a problem and took them out in the morning to reveal noticeably whiter teeth. Now I'm not talking 10 shades whiter, but definitely an improvement.

So I'm supposed to wear them every night this week then switch to every other night for the remaining weeks until the wedding! Inevitably, there will be some sensitivity, so I'm supposed to go back and see the dentist in a couple weeks to check the progress and get some magic salve or something if my teeth get too uncomfortably sensitive.

I hope I don't end up with blinding white Chiclets, looking like Regis Philbin (or worse, Steve Wynn):

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My dentist says that your teeth should not be whiter than the whites of your eyes. Wish me luck!!!

Invitation to Our Non-Shower Dinner

2009-04-10T13:18:00.001-07:00

We just got our invitation for a pre-wedding-non-shower-dinner being thrown for us by a great friend! How no-fuss and old-school-git-er-dun is this?! After Weddingbee and all the fanciness that is invitations, when's the last time you saw something like this? I love it!!! It is sooo our friend!

Mr. P grew up in a wuuuunderful "village-town" in Virginia, just outside of Washington DC. It's un-incorporated, quaint, and full of history. As a teenager, he worked in a family friend's restaurant, an absolutely charming little establishment in an old Victorian street front. Suzi, the proprietor, has since retired to her farm in Leesburg, but her daughter now runs the business.

Suzi spends her days with her tending to the farm, throwing parties and cultivating her grandchildren's horse activities. (Their's is a polo horse farm--not as pretentious as it sounds--and Suzi and her hubby are extremely down to earth people). Their restaurant serves "creative American" and Southern regional cuisine (Suzi is from Tennessee and her husband is from southern Virginia) . It's warm, rustic, and full of momentos from their early American antique and polo activity collections.

When laid-back, energetic and very southern Miss Suzi decided she wanted to throw us the little party, she--in her resolute, exuberant, and no nonsense way--asked, "How about I throw you guys a little party? Some comfort food and mint juleps, that sort of thing..." Why of course!!! And in true form, she sent out a quick, easy and no-fuss invitation for a delicious little southern dinner at the restaurant.

With the exception of a couple date shifts (due to our families--not Suzi's--scheduling difficulties), it's been a fantastically easy planning process (in contrast to the bridal shower). She just told us to send her a list of guests and show up! I heart her so!!!!

I can't wait and feel so touched and happy that Suzi and her husband are doing this for us!

DIY Ring Pillow: From Martha to Mom

2009-04-08T08:08:00.000-07:00

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Have you ever noticed that all my diy posts are really about my mom diy-ing? They should actually be called MDI (mom did it).

The latest project was the ring pillow. I actually helped a little this time. I wanted something like Martha's (oh-so-ubiquitous) flower pillow (above), and played around with making the blossom.

Step 1: Cut ovals out of stiff, light fabric (here, I used some scrap muslin)

Step 2: Pinch the center of each oval and stitch. Martha's instructions suggest twisting floral wire in the middle to achieve the pinching effect (but I didn't have any).

Step 3: After pinching about 15 petals, I put them one on top of the other then basted (lightly sewed) them together through the middle. (See how ubiquitous the flower pillow is? I even printed out Etsy artist, Eizen's, version to compare.)

It was good enough, even for a first try, so I decided to go ahead and use it.

Meanwhile, my mom created the body of the pillow out of some silk traditional dress fabric I had saved from a trip to the old country. (A little cultural nod!)

(Miss Mascara does a great tutorial on how to sew a pillow, so I won't repeat the steps.)

So my mom made the pillow...

...then she attached the blossom along with some RIBBON using her sewing machine. It's important to have the ribbon so you have something to secure the rings.

And here's the final product. The edges of the muslin are fraying, so I'll have to put a little glue or something on them.

What do you think? What are you doing for a ring pillow?

[UPDATE: We're opening an Etsy shop! We're in the planning phases right now and stocking our inventory (read: making pillows and purses!). If you're interested in one of these, email me at roganista@gmail.com. I'M GIVING AWAY FREE custom ring pillows to the first five orders).]

Quickly, The Ceremony Music

2009-04-02T20:52:00.000-07:00

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I've been putting off choosing the ceremony music for some reason. Maybe because I'm utterly an inside-the-box thinker when it comes to this. It's going to be exceptionally unoriginal and a unabashedly trite (like the teaser image above).

So tonight, I got it over with; I ripped off that band-aid super quick. I scanned our musicians' (a string trio) recommendations and threw together a list after listening to the music on Youtube (that's class, right there, ladies!).

All I know is I would prefer not to use the famous Wagner Bridal Chorus (you know, here comes the bride...). And when I checked Weddingbee's ceremony music wiki, I felt validated:

"...classical music fans may note that this tune's appearance in the opera is not entering the church; rather, it is the procession from the church to the...bedroom, frankly. If you have opera fans on the guest list, another option that would inspire less giggling would be "Elsa's Procession to the Cathedral," a similar work also from Lohengrin."

Mr. P's parents are opera lovers...so there's that. But beyond the potential giggling, I'm not so in love with the tune. So, similar to Mrs. Shortcake, I'll be using Canon D, but only for the bridal entrance. Here's my request to Jaime, the lead violinist:

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Jaime,

Regarding the music, my thoughts [shot in the dark is] are below--just typical [tired] stuff. In addition to the ceremony, we need to figure out something for the cocktail hour. Can you give me your thoughts on that [I know you're yawning as you read this]?

Anyway, I'm not too picky [have no clue], but I guess it all depends on how long the program goes [hopefully not too long]. We'll know that better after the end of this month when we meet with Esme [my coordinator who is so over it] and our officiant [I really hope he's well enough to perform our ceremony].

Prelude/Seating:

Trumpet Voluntary by Clark

Allegro Brandenberg Con. No. 4 by Bach

Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring by Bach

Ave Maria by Schubert

Processional

Air On A G String by Bach

Bridal Entrance

Canon in D by Pachelbel

Recessional

Wedding March by Mendelssohn

Cocktail Hour

Fall and Spring by Vivaldi and anything snappy and up tempo you can think of.

Please let me know what you think [not what you truly think--which is probably "you're boring, Miss P"--just if this is good enough for government work]!

Thanks!

Perfume

********

Thoughts? Does this "sound" okay? Anyone have any ideas for cocktail hour music for a string trio?

Underwear Nightmare

2009-04-01T08:32:00.000-07:00

I woke up this morning a little tense from an apparent nightmare. It was about underpants.(?)

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I vaguely remembered something about the reception room not being set up. But what really stirred me was that I didn't have underpants. That is, I didn't have the right ones. Sans proper pantelones. Eeek. My first morsel of panic working its way into my wedding planning psyche.

As I've mentioned, my dress is really gauzy, sheer, and slim-fitting. This requires miracle panties, invisible ones, ones that won't show. Anyone who has seen the dress inevitably asks, What are you going to do about underwear? I can't wear a bra (but that's not really an issue since I have the physique of a 12-year-old boy), but about the bottom half...

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I was thinking Spanx shapewear or some sort of nude boy short. But then again, anything too structured or tight or with any bit of Lycra would cause fat displacement, bulging and binding. A subversive muffin top or jelly roll would probably not look too nice in the photos.

So this morning I Googled "laser cut panties". I have a pair in pink. They're great because they don't have any seams or stitching or elastic; they lay flat due to the way the fabric is cut. But the color would show through the dress. Instead, I found these "invisible" panties by Commando and ordered them in two colors: Buck Naked Nude and True Nude. I'm not taking any chances on them showing under my dress, or else I'll indeed have to go commando (ew).

Attendants' Accessories: Check!

2009-03-31T18:48:00.000-07:00

On the to-do list (which Mr. P is always monitoring) was to get attendants their accessories. Tonight we stopped in to Macy's on our way home from work and got a good deal on some ties for the guys. We weren't too picky. Just something in pale gold or Champagne. And we found them--on sale even--for $25 each. Solid.

And last night I made an offer on Ebay for three of these brooches for the BMs dresses, and won. $18 each. Bargainista! I went ahead and made another offer on three pairs of these earrings at $9 each to the same seller. They countered with $15. Although that's a decent price, I'm going to go ahead and push my luck by offering $12 each*. I'm bored and cheap, clearly.

With all the savings, I bought myself a little make-up treat (which I rarely ever do). I have to admit that I love Benefit's kitschy packaging as much as the products themselves.

Some stuff to paint my face: primer and blusher.

*I ended up getting them for $12 each!

Craptastik! Apparently Bridal Shower Planning is Stressful!

2009-03-30T13:47:00.000-07:00

(click image to enlarge)

I'm not sure it really comes across in my posts, but I have a ridiculous sense of humor (actually, I know it doesn't. All my posts here read as earnest, dweeby or weird for some reason). And no one knows this (the humor part) more than my sister.

Her non-crafting fingers pulled together a cheeky, casual, and cheestastic Evite invitation for my bridal shower--just the way I like it! A little off-beat, and silly. She used the photo "collage" I made a couple months ago (to unceremoniously introduce the BMs to each other) and put it into an invitation that was perfectly and purposefully craptastik! Along with the conveniences of doing the invitation online was the need to quickly salvage some botched planning.

So here's the back story. Originally, another one of my BMs, "A", was full steam ahead with the planning. She had ideas about a lingerie party brunch thing with plenty of doughnuts and breakfast items. Though not my favorite things (I don't eat breakfast or doughnuts and have plenty of lingerie), I was happy with all of it, and just felt honored for all the planning and celebrating on my behalf! I didn't have the heart to tell my friend any different.

She offered up several places, including her home and a couple area restaurants. She did this all on her own without any help. (My sister and cousin, the other two BMs, live out of state.)

She narrowed it down the Tabard Inn, a local place famous for their brunches, when at the last minute, a friend of mine, who happens to be the owner of one of my favorite restaurants, Sonoma, offered his venue--basically for free.

"A" was so exasperated at this point--having apparently done so much leg work in finding a place--that she basically scoffed at the idea of Sonoma and declared her exhaustion and increasing stress level over the planning of the shower. She also complained that too many people were invited and it was turning into a mini-wedding! Wow! Really?

That threw me for a loop. I felt at once embarrassed...and miffed. A last minute change of plans got her upset? She hadn't even put down the deposit! But I was also a little unhappy with my sister for being so hands off and leaving "A" to do all the organizing herself. I couldn't help but think that part of "A's" exasperation was caused by the slacking BMs. Their side of the story, by the way, was that "A" steam rolled the whole thing, and they didn't feel compelled to step on her toes. Such silly drama!!! Given my age, and the age of my BMs, I never thought this could happen. We're in our thirties! Aren't we supposed to be more cooperative than this?

Whatever. There was plenty of finger pointing to go around. I quickly decided that I would rather not have a bridal shower. I didn't register for anything anyway!!!

Long story short, I told "A" that I'd rather NOT have a shower, given all the stress and lack of cooperation (and that I didn't appreciate the mini-wedding comment). And more importantly I hate the idea of burdening anyone. In the meantime, my mother was in the background, looking to be part of the planning process. Oy!!

So "A" apologized, but obliged my request. However, after my sister got the call from "A", along with my text to tell her to cancel her flight, she knew something was awry. So to try to remedy the situation (I think my mom called her), she insisted that we go ahead and have one, but make it simple, unfussy, and unique to my off-beat taste (no lingerie, brunches or doughnuts).

She whipped up the ridonkulous Evite above, reduced the guest list to about a handful of my closest friends, and contacted "A" to plan a foodie-themed (I love cooking and dining and food culture!) bridal shower LUNCH at my mother's house! I think things were strained between the three of us for a little while there, but I hope this will come together and we'll forget about all the stupid whatever it was.

With regard to the new take on the shower, I couldn't be happier!!! (Unfortunately, my cousin canceled her plane tix from California, and won't be able to make it after all the uncoordinated coordination--don't blame her.) But bonus that my mother is extremely excited and proud that she too gets to participate. She's even got the handy man over tonight fixing things up. So cute.

After this little bit of drama in an otherwise stress-free wedding planning process, I'm really looking forward to this casual, meaningful, and funny little shower! (I hope I'm not kidding myself.)

The Wedding Rings!

2009-03-26T19:18:00.000-07:00

A while back, I posted about my disappointment with the wedding band our jeweler created. I sent it back and ordered a different (less intricate) one. And after almost a month of back and forth emails and waiting, I got the new one in the mail tonight! It's a prong-set eternity band. The previous one was more antique-y looking with bead-set milgraining and engraving on the side. This one is a lot simpler, and less vintage looking--and can't be messed up by the jeweler!

And this is Mr. P's sleek and tidy little wedding band of palladium. I love his. It has good heft and shine. He got it a while ago with no complaints or fuss. The best part is that it has our wedding date engraved in it. However with mine, because of the holes cut out behind each diamond culet, I couldn't get engraving.

Here it is with the e-ring. Mr. P thinks it's too flashy, and it's not exactly the understated look that I was hoping for...However, I think it will grow on me!